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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 노*철
2024-11-29 1947

회원님의 영작문

A) In the past, my hobbies were reading, drawing. men's choir, writing, and playing classical guitar.
It seems that most of them were static activities.
Looking back at myself in elementary and middle school, I liked soccer very much, and when I was in elementary school student, I was a school soccer player.
Most of the hobbies I enjoyed as an adult, I started hobbies when I felt that my life was stagnant and I needed to change.
Through such hobby activities, I discover another talent of myself and these motivate me in life.
Whatever we do, over time, our work falls into mannerism.
I also lost the importance of my treatment and lost the appreciation of my life as a dentist because I have been doing dental work for a long time.
However, through these hobbies, I look back on my life and reorient myself.
When I have passion and goals through hobbies, I will become passionate about my job again and strive for better dental treatment.
My hobbies and jobs are always growing together.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

David, I truly appreciate your dedication and effort in completing your homework even when you're not feeling your best. It shows great strength and commitment, and I admire that so much. Your essay was thoughtful and well-written. You did a great job expressing your ideas to the best of your ability, and I can see how much effort you put into it. Keep up the excellent work, and remember to take care of yourself too. You're doing amazing!


~ T. Lia

In the past, my hobbies were reading, drawing. men's choir, writing, and playing classical guitar.
>> In the past, my hobbies were reading, drawing, men's choir, writing, and playing classical guitar.

It seems that most of them were static activities.
>> CORRECT

Looking back at myself in elementary and middle school, I liked soccer very much, and when I was in elementary school student, I was a school soccer player.
>> Looking back at myself in elementary and middle school, I liked soccer very much, and when I was an elementary school student, I was a school soccer player.

Most of the hobbies I enjoyed as an adult, I started hobbies when I felt that my life was stagnant and I needed to change.
>> Most of the hobbies I enjoyed as an adult, I started when I felt that my life was stagnant and I needed to change.

Through such hobby activities, I discover another talent of myself and these motivate me in life.
>> Through such hobby activities, I discover other talents within myself, and these motivate me in life.

Whatever we do, over time, our work falls into mannerism.
>> CORRECT

I also lost the importance of my treatment and lost the appreciation of my life as a dentist because I have been doing dental work for a long time.
>> I also lost the importance of my treatment and lost the appreciation of my life as a dentist because I had been doing dental work for a long time.

However, through these hobbies, I look back on my life and reorient myself.
>> CORRECT

When I have passion and goals through hobbies, I will become passionate about my job again and strive for better dental treatment.
>> When I have passion and goals through hobbies, I become passionate about my job again and strive for better dental treatment.

My hobbies and jobs are always growing together.
>> My hobbies and job are always growing together.
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