¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think the convenience of being constantly connected has made us more productive?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¾È*À±
2024-11-29 2041

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think being constantly connected could be more productive because we can have more time to work and talk with each other.
However, on the contrary, ceaseless connection makes individuals feel exhausted and could lead to less degree of efficiency.
If needed, concentrated short quick connection would be the best to everyone.

Thank you for keeping correcting me with the same pronunciation&grammar problem for these days! I love it.
My brain is not as when I was young, and I am very bad at memorizing something nowadays.... 😂...
Hope for seeing you soon again~~
Have a good day and weekend!😊

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey there, Ms. Anna! Wonderful thoughts! You¡¯ve really captured both the pros and cons of constant connectivity. It¡¯s so true that finding a balance with focused, meaningful interactions can help us stay productive and avoid burnout. Thank you for always putting in the effort with your compositions---I¡¯m always excited to read your thoughtful and insightful responses. Keep up the great work!
~T. Jenna

I think being constantly connected could be more productive because we can have more time to work and talk with each other.
Correct, or
>>I believe that perpetual connectivity has the potential to enhance productivity by creating additional opportunities for work and meaningful communication.
However, on the contrary, ceaseless connection makes individuals feel exhausted and could lead to less degree of efficiency.
>>However, ceaseless connection makes individuals feel exhausted and could lead to a lower level of efficiency.
OR
>>However, non-stop connectivity can quickly lead to burnout and a noticeable drop in productivity.
If needed, concentrated short quick connection would be the best to everyone.
>> If needed, concentrated, short, and quick connections would be best for everyone.
OR
>>When necessary, brief yet focused interactions are likely to be the most effective approach for all parties involved.

****
Thank you for keeping correcting me with the same pronunciation&grammar problem for these days! I love it.
My brain is not as when I was young, and I am very bad at memorizing something nowadays.... 
>>Aw, you¡¯re so sweet! 😊 Don¡¯t worry, we all have those moments, and I¡¯m just glad I can be here to help.  And hey, your brain is still amazing—it's just busy doing so much more now. Keep going, you¡¯re doing great! 💪✨

Hope for seeing you soon again~~
Have a good day and weekend!
>>I hope to see you soon too! I hope your trip to your home country is filled with beautiful memories and warm moments. Enjoy every bit of it, and I can¡¯t wait to hear all about your adventures when you¡¯re back! Safe travels and have an amazing time! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140192 My motto of life µµ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2240
140191 Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2264
140190 Which place or country would you like to visit at least once in... Àå*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2169
140189 Yes ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 1
140188 What are the advantages of living in a city? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 0
140187 What is one hobby you¡¯ve always wanted to try but haven¡¯t yet? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2230
140186 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2070
140185 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2041
140184 What is your favorite day of the week and why? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 5
140183 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2535
140182 This is short essay about Korean greetings culture! ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2
140181 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 0
140180 Which is a better way to spend your holiday, go away on vacation... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 2190
140179 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 2925
140178 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 2381
140177 What are the benefits of having hobbies? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 0
140176 Giving advice ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 2545
140175 What are the best and worst things about October for you? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 2505
140174 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1
140173 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04