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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How could art be appreciated and enjoyed by more people?

작성자: 김*린
2024-12-08 1479

회원님의 영작문

We can enjoy art by watching artwork, listening music, taking photos, drawing pictures, or just feeling. It is common way to enjoy it but people who are not familiar with art, making a friend who is interested in art is a good way to join it. You can just follow your friend and soak your feet a little by going an exhibition, museum, music festival, etcetera. Also there are many programs that can join one day like 'Listening to music while drinking cocktail', 'Watch a movie together and talk about it', 'drawing on day class'. I believe that these days, there are so many things that can relish art easily.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hey there, Lin! Great effort! I love how you highlighted various ways to enjoy art and included practical suggestions. Your ideas are inspiring and make art accessible to everyone. Keep sharing your thoughts!
~T. Jenna

We can enjoy art by watching artwork, listening music, taking photos, drawing pictures, or just feeling. 
>>We can enjoy art by watching artwork, listening to music, taking photos, drawing pictures, or just feeling.
OR
>> Art can be experienced through various mediums, such as observing visual art, immersing oneself in music, documenting scenes with photography, engaging in drawing, or embracing the overall essence of art.
It is common way to enjoy it but people who are not familiar with art, making a friend who is interested in art is a good way to join it. 
>>It is a common way to enjoy it, but for people who are not familiar with art, making friends who are interested in art is a good way to get involved.
OR
>> hile it's common to enjoy art in many ways, for those unfamiliar with it, befriending an art enthusiast is a great way to dip your toes in.
You can just follow your friend and soak your feet a little by going an exhibition, museum, music festival, etcetera. 
>>You can just follow your friend and soak your feet a little by going to an exhibition, museum, music festival, etc.
OR
>> You can tag along with a friend and get a taste of art by attending exhibitions, museums, music festivals, and the like.
Also there are many programs that can join one day like 'Listening to music while drinking cocktail', 'Watch a movie together and talk about it', 'drawing on day class'. 
>>There are also many programs you can join for a day, like 'Listening to music while drinking a cocktail,' 'Watching a movie together and talking about it,' and 'Drawing in a day class.
OR
>> There are also plenty of one-day art programs, such as 'Listening to music with a cocktail in hand,' 'watching a movie and discussing it,' or 'attending a drawing workshop.'
I believe that these days, there are so many things that can relish art easily.
>>I believe that these days, there are so many things that can help us relish art easily.
OR
>>  In today's world, there is an abundance of opportunities to experience and savor art with ease.
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