¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so that IELTS Speaking 6.5 or higher sc

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÀÎ
2024-12-09 1556

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do schools in your country have music lessons?
Do a lot of people like music?
Do you think music education is important for children?
Do you think children should learn to play an instrument at school?
What musical instruments do you enjoy listening to the most?
Have you ever learned to play a musical instrument?
Yes, most schools in my country offer music lessons. Many people love music, and I believe music education is essential for children. It¡¯s also great if children can learn to play an instrument. I enjoy listening to the piano and guitar, and I¡¯ve tried learning the piano in the past.


Do you prefer to watch films at home or in the cinema?
How often do you watch films?
I prefer to watch films at home because it's more comfortable, and I can relax without distractions. I usually watch films once or twice a week, depending on my schedule.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for entrusting me to simplify your answers Young In. I hope you'll be able to remember all these responses. Good luck! 

>>> TEACHER GEMMA

Do schools in your country have music lessons?
Do a lot of people like music?
Do you think music education is important for children?
Do you think children should learn to play an instrument at school?
What musical instruments do you enjoy listening to the most?
Have you ever learned to play a musical instrument?

>>>Yes, most schools in my country have music lessons. Many people love music, and I think it¡¯s important for kids to learn. It¡¯s also great if they can play an instrument. I like listening and learning the piano and guitar.


Do you prefer to watch films at home or in the cinema?
How often do you watch films?

>>>I prefer watching films at home because it's more comfortable and I can relax without distractions. I usually watch films once or twice a week, depending on my schedule.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140502 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2055
140501 How would your life be different without access to technology? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2133
140500 What song do you think has the best lyrics? Why do those lyrics... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2191
140499 What\'s the most memorable adventure you\'ve had with friends? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2333
140498 How do you think computers will change in the next 10 years? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2329
140497 Do you think saving money is easier when you have a specific... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 1938
140496 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2165
140495 Do people need to be punished? Why? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 3034
140494 English is very important to me! ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2295
140493 Many recent college graduates are un- or underemployed. What do... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2944
140492 16oct2024- homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 2389
140491 What qualities does a person need to have to take care of old... ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-18 1
140490 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 1
140489 What occupations are most affected by weather? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 3
140488 right to protect celebrities\' private lives. ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 2945
140487 What do you and your classmates do during your lunch break? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 2229
140486 Do you like visiting Jeju Island? Why or why not? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 3
140485 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 1903
140484 Does an age difference make it difficult to be friends? ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 2042
140483 Is the weather in a country important when you choose a place to... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-17 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04