¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so that IELTS Speaking 6.5 or higher sc

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÀÎ
2024-12-09 1571

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do schools in your country have music lessons?
Do a lot of people like music?
Do you think music education is important for children?
Do you think children should learn to play an instrument at school?
What musical instruments do you enjoy listening to the most?
Have you ever learned to play a musical instrument?
Yes, most schools in my country offer music lessons. Many people love music, and I believe music education is essential for children. It¡¯s also great if children can learn to play an instrument. I enjoy listening to the piano and guitar, and I¡¯ve tried learning the piano in the past.


Do you prefer to watch films at home or in the cinema?
How often do you watch films?
I prefer to watch films at home because it's more comfortable, and I can relax without distractions. I usually watch films once or twice a week, depending on my schedule.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for entrusting me to simplify your answers Young In. I hope you'll be able to remember all these responses. Good luck! 

>>> TEACHER GEMMA

Do schools in your country have music lessons?
Do a lot of people like music?
Do you think music education is important for children?
Do you think children should learn to play an instrument at school?
What musical instruments do you enjoy listening to the most?
Have you ever learned to play a musical instrument?

>>>Yes, most schools in my country have music lessons. Many people love music, and I think it¡¯s important for kids to learn. It¡¯s also great if they can play an instrument. I like listening and learning the piano and guitar.


Do you prefer to watch films at home or in the cinema?
How often do you watch films?

>>>I prefer watching films at home because it's more comfortable and I can relax without distractions. I usually watch films once or twice a week, depending on my schedule.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140339 >> Do you ever worry about other people listening to your mobile... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2
140338 What qualities do you value most in a friend, and why? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2459
140337 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 3
140336 Abandoned stuff ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2733
140335 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2462
140334 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 0
140333 What\'s your favorite summer sport? Why? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2
140332 How do you view people who are very passionate about politics? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2
140331 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2195
140330 I\'ve been using my cell phone since I was young. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 3027
140329 Q) Did you ever watch a movie not because of the story but... ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 0
140328 my friend ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 0
140327 help ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 1
140326 listen carefully ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2331
140325 School home work Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2314
140324 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-09 2066
140323 self introduction ½Å*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-08 2
140322 Homework 1008 ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-08 2231
140321 What is something you never learned to do but wish you had? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-08 0
140320 What do you like about your country? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-08 2257

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04