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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What do you like most about your room? Why?

작성자: 이*윤
2024-12-23 1921

회원님의 영작문

My favorite things in my room are the makeup table and bed.
The reason I like the makeup table and bed the most is because it's my first makeup table and bed.
Actually, the bed is a strange bed with no frame and only a mattress.
It is a makeup table and bed that I have as I live alone away from my family because of work.
Before I became independent, I lived without my own makeup table and bed, but I got my own makeup table and bed!
I think it's better because I don't have to rent my mom's makeup table, and I don't have to sleep in one room with my family, and I also feel a lot of comfort.
In addition, when I grow up and become an adult, my dream was to do makeup on my own makeup table someday and wake up in a pretty bed like a Disney princess' bed and decorate my bed, but I feel that my dream has come true, so I like my makeup table and bed.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi!

Thank you for sharing your answer.
It was nice that your favorite things in your room really hold significant meanings; I think especially the symbol of you being an adult as well as being independent. ^^ 

~ Teacher Gina


My favorite things in my room are the makeup table and bed.
>> CORRECT.
The reason I like the makeup table and bed the most is because it's my first makeup table and bed.
>> CORRECT.
Actually, the bed is a strange bed with no frame and only a mattress.
>> CORRECT.
It is a makeup table and bed that I have as I live alone away from my family because of work.
>> I have a makeup table and bed because I live alone, away from my family due to work.
Before I became independent, I lived without my own makeup table and bed, but I got my own makeup table and bed!
>> CORRECT.
I think it's better because I don't have to rent my mom's makeup table, and I don't have to sleep in one room with my family, and I also feel a lot of comfort.
>> I think it's better because I don't have to borrow my mom's makeup table, I don't have to sleep in the same room with my family, and I also feel much more comfortable.
In addition, when I grow up and become an adult, my dream was to do makeup on my own makeup table someday and wake up in a pretty bed like a Disney princess' bed and decorate my bed, but I feel that my dream has come true, so I like my makeup table and bed.
>> In addition, when I grew up, my dream was to do my makeup on my own makeup table someday and wake up in a pretty bed, like a Disney princess's bed, and decorate it. Now that my dream has come true, I really love my makeup table and bed.
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