¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Please change difficult words to easy words and correct them so that IELTS Speaking 6.5 or higher sc

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÀÎ
2025-01-06 1681

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Will you buy a new one in the future?
What was your first mobile phone?
à My first mobile phone was a simple flip phone, and I was very excited to have it. I plan to buy a new phone in the future if my current one gets outdated.

Do you like being busy?
When do you find it hard to allocate time?
à I like being busy as it keeps me productive, but it¡¯s hard to manage time when I have multiple deadlines. Proper planning helps me stay organized.

Is it easy to manage time for you?
How do you plan your time in a day?
à Managing time is challenging but doable with a schedule. I plan my day by listing priorities and setting specific times for tasks.

Who do you like to watch sports games with?
Do you like to watch live sports games?
à Yes, I enjoy watching live sports games because they are exciting and energetic. I prefer watching them with friends or family for a fun experience.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey there, Young In! Please check the following:
~T. Jenna

Will you buy a new one in the future?
What was your first mobile phone?
My first mobile phone was a simple flip phone, and I was very excited to have it. I plan to buy a new phone in the future if my current one gets outdated.
>> 
My first mobile phone was a basic flip phone, and I was really excited to own it. It was a big deal for me at the time. I plan to buy a new phone in the future if my current one becomes outdated, as technology keeps evolving quickly.

Do you like being busy?
When do you find it hard to allocate time?
I like being busy as it keeps me productive, but it¡¯s hard to manage time when I have multiple deadlines. Proper planning helps me stay organized.
>>I enjoy staying busy because it helps me remain productive, but managing my time can be challenging when I have multiple deadlines. However, proper planning plays a crucial role in keeping me organized and ensuring I stay on top of my tasks.

Is it easy to manage time for you?
How do you plan your time in a day?
Managing time is challenging but doable with a schedule. I plan my day by listing priorities and setting specific times for tasks.
>>Managing time can be challenging, but it's definitely achievable with a proper schedule. I plan my day by making a list of priorities and assigning specific times for each task, which helps me stay focused and organized.

Who do you like to watch sports games with?
Do you like to watch live sports games?
Yes, I enjoy watching live sports games because they are exciting and energetic. I prefer watching them with friends or family for a fun experience.
>>Yes, I'm keen on watching live sports games because they¡¯re exciting and full of energy. I prefer watching them with friends or family as it makes the experience more enjoyable and creates a lively atmosphere.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141257 Is it wise to have a boyfriend or girlfriend while still in... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 2067
141256 HOMEWORK FOR 11.29.2024 WRITING TASK: How do you feel about... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 3
141255 Do you think the convenience of being constantly connected has... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1968
141254 What is more exhausting: physical work or mental work? Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1
141253 Homework ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 2
141252 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1900
141251 Describe your favorite restaurant or coffee shop where you hang... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 2097
141250 Locals in Taiwan ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1446
141249 What are your thoughts on online shopping? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1608
141248 27Nov2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 2074
141247 When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up. Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 0
141246 25nov2024_homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1745
141245 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1873
141244 What will you tell your future self? ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1659
141243 Do you have any friends from a different culture or country than... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 2000
141242 HOOMEWORK ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1716
141241 Homework ¾ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1968
141240 What¡¯s the most thoughtful gesture you¡¯ve received from a... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1654
141239 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 2233
141238 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 5

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04