¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the best food to eat when you are sick?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿¬
2025-01-21 1359

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The rice porridge is the best food to eat when I am sick.
Because I can easily eat when I don't want to eat anything.
Also, It is easy to make with a rice and water.
And the sweet food like chocolate and jelly are also the best food to eat when I am sick.
It makes me powerful and happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Nicole!
You did so well! I'm so proud of your writing! Keep up the good job and take note of the corrections as well so you can improve more. Great writing! See you on Thursday!
~~Teacher Kate 

The rice porridge is the best food to eat when I am sick.
>>CORRECT!
Because I can easily eat when I don't want to eat anything.
>>Because I can eat it easily, even when I don¡¯t feel like eating anything.
Also, It is easy to make with a rice and water.
>>It is also simple to make with just rice and water.
And the sweet food like chocolate and jelly are also the best food to eat when I am sick.
>>Sweet foods like chocolate and jelly are also great to eat when I am sick. 
It makes me powerful and happy.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140243 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-05 2
140242 Imagine you have won ten million dollars. Who will you tell?... ¿À*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-10-05 1550
140241 What qualities of a person do most people admire? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-05 2
140240 How would the world look if everyone had the same talents? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2427
140239 Proper Compulsiveness makes it better ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2474
140238 English grammar is difficult to me! ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1
140237 Being physically attractive ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2563
140236 How do you balance hard work with other aspects of your life,... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 1
140235 What do you think about adopting pets from shelters? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 3107
140234 Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2553
140233 Should more people use public transport instead of cars or... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2366
140232 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2579
140231 What kind of people are less likely to suffer from stress or... ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 4
140230 I agree with that idea Àü*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2640
140229 What do you do when you are exhausted? Àå*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2315
140228 Sleep ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2462
140227 In which company do you wish to work for a long time? What... Àå*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-04 2410
140226 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 1906
140225 Who plays a more substantial role in a person\'s life, family or... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 2581
140224 Homework ¾È*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-03 2168

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04