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To what extent should parents be involved in their children\'s affairs/life?

작성자: 문*현
2025-02-09 1243

회원님의 영작문

When said parenting, there is a difficulty balancing between interference and negligence. If parents interfere too much in children’s affairs, there is a problem of extreme dependency. However, indifferent parents can result in deviation and lack of affection. In my opinion, parents should interfere with children’s lives to guarantee mental independence. This is because parents’ role is to give guidance or advice to their children’s life because of the longer life experience. There is wisdom that will guide the younger generation to mental maturity. As I am 29 years old, I often seek advice from my parents regarding complicated matters. However, there is an extreme example such as helicopter parent. In my perspective those overprotective parents derived from the fact that many parents reflect their desire to their children and not treat their kids as independent self. I believe good parenting is to provide the resources required to bring up the kids when it is required.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Aciel!

When said parenting, there is a difficulty balancing between interference and negligence. 
>>> OR: When it comes to parenting, there is a difficulty balancing between interference and negligence.  
If parents interfere too much in children’s affairs, there is a problem of extreme dependency. 
>>>  correct
>> OR: If parents interfere too much in their children’s affairs, it can lead to extreme dependency.  
However, indifferent parents can result in deviation and lack of affection. 
>>> correct
In my opinion, parents should interfere with children’s lives to guarantee mental independence. 
>>> correct
This is because parents’ role is to give guidance or advice to their children’s life because of the longer life experience. 
>>> correct   
There is wisdom that will guide the younger generation to mental maturity. 
>>>  correct    
As I am 29 years old, I often seek advice from my parents regarding complicated matters. 
>>>  OR: Being in my 29 years of age, I often seek advice from my parents regarding complicated matters.  
However, there is an extreme example such as helicopter parent. 
>>>   However, there is an extreme example such as a helicopter parent. 
In my perspective those overprotective parents derived from the fact that many parents reflect their desire to their children and not treat their kids as independent self.
>>>  OR: In my perspective, those overprotective parents were derived from the fact that many parents reflect their desire to their children and not treat their kids as independent individuals.  
I believe good parenting is to provide the resources required to bring up the kids when it is required.
>>>   correct    
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