¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Does it need to go to school before the age of seven?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿ø
2025-02-11 1578

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In modern society, I don't think children need to go to school before the age of seven, because they attend childcare institutions such as kindergartens at an earlier age. Childcare institutions like kindergartens are also places where children can experience group life and receive an education.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Ms. Rachel!

Your use of language is sophisticated, with varied sentence structures that enhance the overall flow. Your vocabulary is precise and contributes to the clarity. Keep it up!

>>> TEACHER GEMMA

In modern society, I don't think children need to go to school before the age of seven, because they attend childcare institutions such as kindergartens at an earlier age.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 Childcare institutions like kindergartens are also places where children can experience group life and receive an education.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144153 Do doctors have a duty to serve the country before their... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 1048
144152 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 909
144151 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 1057
144150 5/14 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144149 5/15 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144148 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144147 5/16 Himework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144146 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 1
144145 What are some common mistakes people make during emergency calls? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144144 What is your dream job? Á¶*¸® ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 892
144143 What is the best surprise you ever had? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 1071
144142 Have you ever prepared a full course (appetizer, main dish,... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 2
144141 Do you think that your country is changing rapidly? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 810
144140 Please call this number 010 3559 2141 ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 983
144139 homework ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 779
144138 The homework for 16th May. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 969
144137 Homework ¹Ú*¿í ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 932
144136 What food will you \"NEVER\" eat? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 1
144135 I like watermelon. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 1103
144134 D4 essay homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 1085

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04