무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

The homework of 11th Fab.

작성자: 조*호
2025-02-12 975

회원님의 영작문

Q : Do you think "mind-reading" technology could be dangerous? Why or why not?

A : Yes. I think it could be dangerous for human.
Because sometime people need to conceal something whether it is bad or not.
However, due to mind-reading skill, they would not be able to conceal everything.
Then, they will get a blame or shame or further bad emotions.
But, i think mind-reading skill can be used in specific fields.
For example, it can be used for finding criminals who lying.
So, i think limited using of mind-reading can be helpful.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Eddy,

Thank you for your homework! I really appreciate your effort in sharing your thoughts on this topic.

Your answer is thoughtful, and you’ve clearly considered both the potential dangers and benefits of mind-reading technology. I like how you pointed out that sometimes people need privacy or the ability to conceal certain things, which could make mind-reading dangerous. Your mention of possible negative consequences like blame, shame, and bad emotions adds a strong emotional perspective to your argument.

You also make a valid point about the potential benefits in specific fields, like crime investigation, which shows you understand the complexity of this technology.

One thing to keep in mind is that while you’ve done a great job explaining your point, it might be helpful to elaborate a bit more on how exactly mind-reading technology could be used safely in certain situations. For example, how could people’s privacy be protected in these situations?

But overall, your answer is clear and insightful. I’m really proud of your work! Keep up the good effort, and I look forward to your next homework!

~Teacher Cathy

 

Yes. I think it could be dangerous for human.

>>Yes, I think it could be dangerous for humans.

Because sometime people need to conceal something whether it is bad or not.

>>Because sometimes people need to conceal something, whether it is bad or not.

However, due to mind-reading skill, they would not be able to conceal everything.

>>However, due to the mind-reading skill, they would not be able to conceal everything.

Then, they will get a blame or shame or further bad emotions.

>>Then, they will receive blame, shame, or further bad emotions.

But, i think mind-reading skill can be used in specific fields.

>>But I think the mind-reading skill can be used in specific fields.

For example, it can be used for finding criminals who lying.

>>For example, it can be used for criminals who are lying.

So, i think limited using of mind-reading can be helpful.

>>So, I think limited use of mind-reading can be helpful.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
142867 Who is the greatest founder of a company that you know? 김*환 완료 2025-03-05 3
142866 Who among your family members loves eating the most? 송*자 완료 2025-03-05 1
142865 Homework 이*숙 완료 2025-03-05 559
142864 wild bear 권*희 완료 2025-03-05 591
142863 2025.03.04 homework! 이*준 완료 2025-03-05 575
142862 abandon 민*정 완료 2025-03-05 2
142861 What do you feel most people’s lives are driven by? 최*연 완료 2025-03-05 784
142860 How do past experiences shape your appreciation of life? 노*철 완료 2025-03-05 663
142859 What other cuisines have you tried aside from Vietnamese cuisine... 박*호 완료 2025-03-05 692
142858 s 조*희 완료 2025-03-05 733
142857 using technology during dinner 조*정 완료 2025-03-04 727
142856 Why do you think some people believes in astrology? 김*경 완료 2025-03-04 683
142855 homework 김*연 완료 2025-03-04 0
142854 How do you differentiate your job from a doctor when it comes to... 이*중 완료 2025-03-04 1
142853 Why do you think studying English is crucial for both personal... 김*경 완료 2025-03-04 647
142852 Why did many people suddenly become interested in growing plants... 차*진 완료 2025-03-04 693
142851 How does your family celebrate The March 1st Movement day. 차*혁 완료 2025-03-04 670
142850 Are fast food franchises popular in your country? Explain. 차*진 완료 2025-03-04 712
142849 Why are most chefs fat? Why do you think of this phenomenon? 차*진 완료 2025-03-04 667
142848 Can you guess the social status of someone in your country from... 문*현 완료 2025-03-04 701

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04