¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

expectation in class and teacher

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2025-02-12 1209

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, I want to be a influent speaker of english, because if I go abroad, communication with others in english is important.
second, I need minimum 6.5 scores in IELTS test. In the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
Third, when I talk in engish, my brain usually operates grammar. it makes me time delay,,, how can I solve it?

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung Min!
Thank you for your composition today.
Your expectations are noted.
Let's work together to achieve our goals.
Please review the corrections below.
Ask during the class if you have any questions.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
First of all, I want to be a influent speaker of english, because if I go abroad, communication with others in english is important.
>> First of all, I want to be fluent in speaking in English because if I go abroad, communicating with others using English is important. 
second, I need minimum 6.5 scores in IELTS test. 
>> Second, I need a minimum score of 6.5 on the IELTS test. 
In the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
>> During the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
Third, when I talk in engish, my brain usually operates grammar. 
>> Third, when I speak in English, my brain usually analyzes grammar rules. 
it makes me time delay,,, 
>> It causes delay when I say something. 
how can I solve it?
>> How can I improve on this?
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142224 yes, I love oranges. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-01 1678
142223 \"Importance of Rest and Balance in a Busy Life¡° ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-01 1674
142222 Homework ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 2
142221 What do you do to easily get along with other people? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1687
142220 Organ donation is one of the best donations that people can do ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1
142219 The book that I¡¯ll introduce today is ¡®The First-time Teacher... À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1366
142218 Dear, Cathy teacher ¹è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1543
142217 Doing nothing is meaningful ÇÑ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1293
142216 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1696
142215 How do you typically protect yourself from the dust when it¡¯s... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1649
142214 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1671
142213 Do you prefer a quick goodbye or a long farewell? Why? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1512
142212 What surprised you about getting older? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1302
142211 Trump ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1986
142210 Write the best way to have a staycation during the Korean New... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1383
142209 What is your ideal summer camp? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1731
142208 Write about the most interesting summer camp you can think of. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1434
142207 How do you celebrate Seollal with your family? ÀÓ*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1999
142206 Write about the first time you were on a plane. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1810
142205 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04