¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

expectation in class and teacher

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2025-02-12 783

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, I want to be a influent speaker of english, because if I go abroad, communication with others in english is important.
second, I need minimum 6.5 scores in IELTS test. In the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
Third, when I talk in engish, my brain usually operates grammar. it makes me time delay,,, how can I solve it?

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung Min!
Thank you for your composition today.
Your expectations are noted.
Let's work together to achieve our goals.
Please review the corrections below.
Ask during the class if you have any questions.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
First of all, I want to be a influent speaker of english, because if I go abroad, communication with others in english is important.
>> First of all, I want to be fluent in speaking in English because if I go abroad, communicating with others using English is important. 
second, I need minimum 6.5 scores in IELTS test. 
>> Second, I need a minimum score of 6.5 on the IELTS test. 
In the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
>> During the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
Third, when I talk in engish, my brain usually operates grammar. 
>> Third, when I speak in English, my brain usually analyzes grammar rules. 
it makes me time delay,,, 
>> It causes delay when I say something. 
how can I solve it?
>> How can I improve on this?
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142012 How should someone who committed a crime for some good cause be... À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 874
142011 Homework! À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 1097
142010 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 1
142009 What are some typical misconceptions people have about you? ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 934
142008 Why did you decide to grow vegetables? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 3
142007 Have you ever had a lucky experience with the number 7? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 1058
142006 1/15 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 1
142005 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 906
142004 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 875
142003 How do you perceive failure? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 892
142002 What activity do you want to squeeze into your routine? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-16 1028
142001 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 2
142000 What is the best thing about your job? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 1101
141999 What¡¯s something you¡¯ve been meaning to buy but haven¡¯t... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 809
141998 June_homework ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 1
141997 Do you have friends from a culture or country different from... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 971
141996 Homework ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 940
141995 I don\'t want to be a firefighter. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 835
141994 I always remind myself the Three things ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 2
141993 The homework of 14th Jan. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 953

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04