¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of having many cousins?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Áø
2025-02-14 1062

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First, advantages is more people play with me and disadvantages is loud, annoying and they are touch my things so could be breaking my things.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's another corrected composition, Yale! Many thanks for sending it. Please take a look at the few revisions and alternative expressions provided. See you soon! 


Cheers,
Jean~~

        



                    What are the advantages and disadvantages of having many cousins?


First, advantages is more people play with me and disadvantages is loud, annoying and 
they are touch my things so could be breaking my things.
>> One advantage is that I have more people to play with, whereas some advantages are, that they are loud, annoying, and touch or even break my things. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142636 2025.02.20 homework! ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1252
142635 If you could go on vacation anywhere in the world for free,... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1
142634 Homework🥰 ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1049
142633 introduction of yourself ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1116
142632 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1006
142631 How important is patience for a violin class leader? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 982
142630 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1017
142629 young fashion ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1
142628 hurt ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1
142627 2/19 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1021
142626 Are there many Koreans who change their names ? What is usually... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1208
142625 MY MBTI ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1029
142624 How do you usually handle stress? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 932
142623 Do you think listening to sad music when you\'re feeling down... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 966
142622 What kind of prank can you do? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1196
142621 My expectations. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 4
142620 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 1067
142619 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 1
142618 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 0
142617 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04