¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the greatest lesson you have learned from a book or a movie?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2025-02-18 1065

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I learned the importance of moral standard in simple day by watching a movie which is shown the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball in LA Dodgers.
He picks up trashes as soon as realizes them on the street.
He believes that he gathers other's luck, although someone can comprehend them just a trash.
His teach makes me pick up trashes on the street and I become to think in terms of my luck.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung Min!
Thank you for your effort today.
I can see form your writing that you need to widen your vocabulary.
You have basic knowledge of sentence structure and that's a good start.
Now, we just need to make sure that you are familiar with the right terms for the right ideas.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I learned the importance of moral standard in simple day by watching a movie which is shown the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball in LA Dodgers.
>> I learned the importance of moral standards on a simple day when watching a movie which showed the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball for the LA Dodgers.
He picks up trashes as soon as realizes them on the street.
>> He picks up trash when he sees it on the street.
He believes that he gathers other's luck, although someone can comprehend them just a trash.
>> He believes that by doing so, he can gather others' luck while some people would just see it as trash.
His teach makes me pick up trashes on the street and I become to think in terms of my luck.
>> His philosophy encourages me to pick up trash on the street which I now think of as luck. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141032 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1865
141031 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1587
141030 What are the consequences of spending less time interacting... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1872
141029 I think there are more advantage than disadvantage. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 2
141028 Music ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1655
141027 Page.51 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-18 1998
141026 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1
141025 How do you feel about the idea of \\ Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 2
141024 Who is the healthiest person you know? What do they do to stay... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1972
141023 People get exercise while playing sports. Which sports are the... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1656
141022 How do you begin your day? Write about it. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1677
141021 Do you think it\'s important to have a buddy? Why or why not? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1
141020 Are you close to your neighbors? How do you get along with them? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 2167
141019 People ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1862
141018 Dolphinsdoll ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1685
141017 When do you prefer having a family gathering? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 2011
141016 the bood and the movie ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 0
141015 To teacher ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2024-11-17 1862
141014 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 1814
141013 WRITING TASK ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-11-16 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04