¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Everyone prefers to look younger

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿ø
2025-02-18 1040

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

"Everyone prefers to look younger. And I think someone who manages their appearance well has a positive mindset. But being overly concerned with one's appearance is a sign of low self-esteem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thanks for doing your essay Ms. Rachel! Well done! Your knowledge of the dispute and the events surrounding it shows in your essay. It is clear that you understand the main points of contention, and you have discussed these in an easily understood way. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
>>>Everyone prefers to look younger.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 And I think someone who manages their appearance well has a positive mindset. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
But being overly concerned with one's appearance is a sign of low self-esteem.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142457 What¡¯s the most generous offer you¡¯ve ever made to someone? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 1085
142456 2/11 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 1
142455 Gifts or offerings at Korean funerals ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 971
142454 What role does technology play in modern tourism? °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 2
142453 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 0
142452 Exercise in the gym or Outdoor exercise-Exercising in the gym is... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1260
142451 How would you describe your glasses to someone over the phone? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1
142450 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1063
142449 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 3
142448 Who\'s the most outstanding male you know? What makes him... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1038
142447 How long are you usually allowed to play games and not study? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1034
142446 What is your ideal family structure? ¼­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1
142445 Homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1048
142444 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1064
142443 The homework of 10th Fab. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 988
142442 > Since you have experienced being a foreign student yourself,... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1056
142441 What do you think of Mr. Yoon\'s impeachment? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1102
142440 Do you enjoy spending time alone, or do you prefer to be around... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 2
142439 Homework ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1517
142438 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1183

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04