¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think parties are fun even without alcohol? Why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-02-27 848

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I had dinner meetings with my staffs, I had several meetings with their husbands too.
At that time, a staff's husband complained to his wife before the meeting.
"We have to drink if we are going to get together and talk. How can we talk without drinking?"
However, after the meeting, he told his wife that he found out that men were able to talk well without drinking.
When people drink alcohol, their judgment becomes blurred and they follow the party atmosphere.
Many men's mistakes happen in the atmosphere of drinking.
Rather, if we talk while drinking coffee, we can organize and deliver our honest stories, listen to others better, and eventually get to know each other better.
We can talk and laugh together while listening to music.
What a party it is?

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David, you did an excellent job of clearly expressing your ideas! You made a powerful point about drinking culture and social relationships in your response. For more fluid wording and natural viewpoints, I made a few adjustments. Overall, it was impressive. Keep it up!

~ T. Lia

When I had dinner meetings with my staffs, I had several meetings with their husbands too.
>> When I had dinner meetings with my staff, I also had several meetings with their husbands.


At that time, a staff's husband complained to his wife before the meeting.
>> At that time, one of my staff member¡¯s husbands complained to his wife before the meeting.


"We have to drink if we are going to get together and talk. How can we talk without drinking?"
>> CORRECT


However, after the meeting, he told his wife that he found out that men were able to talk well without drinking.
>> However, after the meeting, he told his wife that he realized men could have meaningful conversations without drinking.


When people drink alcohol, their judgment becomes blurred and they follow the party atmosphere.
>> When people drink alcohol, their judgment becomes impaired, and they tend to follow the party atmosphere.


Many men's mistakes happen in the atmosphere of drinking.
>> Many mistakes made by men occur in drinking environments.


Rather, if we talk while drinking coffee, we can organize and deliver our honest stories, listen to others better, and eventually get to know each other better.
>> Instead, if we talk over coffee, we can express our thoughts more clearly, listen to others better, and ultimately get to know each other more deeply.


We can talk and laugh together while listening to music.
>> CORRECT


What a party it is?
>> What a party it is! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142573 1 Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 1127
142572 What lifestyle in Japan do you want to adopt in Korea? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 1022
142571 What do you think of blind dates? Does it pose dangers to women? ÀÌ*Áß ¿Ï·á 2025-02-18 1256
142570 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 971
142569 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1
142568 the earth ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 2
142567 Do you consider yourself knowledgeable about current events? Why... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1180
142566 What do you enjoy the most about camping? (having conversation,... ÀÓ*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 809
142565 What do you do if you look pale but not sick? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1058
142564 I love pizza. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1211
142563 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1
142562 The homework of 14th Fab. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1103
142561 The masterpiece of god ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 0
142560 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1132
142559 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1313
142558 homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1022
142557 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 1174
142556 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 919
142555 How often do you order food delivery, and what¡¯s your favorite... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 860
142554 I attatched the homework file🥰 ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-17 953

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04