¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ÀÎ
2025-03-10 611

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I totally agree with the opinion that sports are important part of education.
First of all, by sports students can improve their physical strength. And this physical strength is basic for the everything in the world. Even studying, that seems to work out without lots of movement, actually requires lots of stamina, since the one has to be keep focused by using his or her brain. To let students try various things without strength limitation, it's necessary to help reinforce stamina by educating sports.
Second, sports help students have strong mental health. In sports games, students experience competing with each other. Sometimes they are winner but sometimes they are loser. Through this they learn how to control their own minds. And in the process of working hard to win they can understand the hardships they have to overcome to achieve a goal and they would be able to handle more stressful things later.
Therefore I think sports are necessary in the education.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Ms. WooIn! I completely agree with you! They offer much more than physical fitness; they teach life skills that will benefit students long after they graduate. Thank you for sharing!
-T. Sonny
I totally agree with the opinion that sports are important part of education.
>>I totally agree with the opinion that sports are an important part of education.
First of all, by sports students can improve their physical strength. 
>>First of all, sports help students improve their physical strength.
And this physical strength is basic for the everything in the world. 
>>This physical strength is fundamental for everything in the world.
Even studying, that seems to work out without lots of movement, actually requires lots of stamina, since the one has to be keep focused by using his or her brain. 
>>Even studying, which might seem like it doesn¡¯t require much physical movement, actually demands a lot of stamina because one must stay focused and use their brain.
To let students try various things without strength limitation, it's necessary to help reinforce stamina by educating sports.
>>To allow students to try various activities without being limited by physical strength, it is necessary to help reinforce stamina through sports education.
Second, sports help students have strong mental health. 
>>Second, sports help students have mental strength.
In sports games, students experience competing with each other. 
>>In sports competitions, students experience both winning and losing.
Sometimes they are winner but sometimes they are loser. 
>>Sometimes they are winners, but sometimes they are losers.
Through this they learn how to control their own minds. 
>>Through this, they learn how to control their emotions and manage both success and failure.
And in the process of working hard to win they can understand the hardships they have to overcome to achieve a goal and they would be able to handle more stressful things later.
>>Additionally, by working hard to achieve victory, they understand the challenges they must overcome to reach their goals and help them develop the resilience to handle more stressful situations in the future.
Therefore I think sports are necessary in the education.
>>Therefore, I believe sports are necessary in education.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
143559 What is your favorite musical of all time, and what makes it... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 2
143558 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 249
143557 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 3
143556 Do you prefer working overtime for extra pay or keeping your... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 1
143555 0409 IELTS writing Task2 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 2
143554 Do you like purchasing items or goods ahead of time? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 221
143553 HOMEWORK FOR TODAY ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 196
143552 water ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 1
143551 shark ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 1
143550 I want ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 1
143549 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... Á¶*¸í ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 3
143548 What is the most important change we can make to protect the... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 242
143547 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 292
143546 What kind of person do you want your child to become, and how... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 294
143545 In what ways has your relationship with your pet affedted your... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 232
143544 Have you ever had a special memory or event happen in a... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 210
143543 What are the advantages of being bilingual? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 235
143542 What are the most important things you want to share when... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 226
143541 What are the pros of socializing with other people? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 218
143540 Why do you think more people choose not to get married recently? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-10 272

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04