¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your thoughts on power interruptions?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Áø
2025-03-11 698

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My thoughts power interruptions is scary because the power interruptions is dark so it is scary power interruption in my school four years ago.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your corrected composition, Yale!  Many thanks for sending it. Please take a look at the few revisions and alternative expressions provided.   


Cheers,
Jean~~



        

                          What are your thoughts on power interruptions?



My thoughts power interruptions is scary because the power interruptions is dark so it is scary power interruption in my school four years ago.
>> I think power interruptions are scary because it becomes dark without electricity. For example, there was a power interruption four years ago in my school and I was scared. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142896 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 773
142895 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 682
142894 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 2
142893 Various clubs È«*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 820
142892 Do you like reading books or watching movies more? Why? Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 768
142891 Why do you prefer dining in rather than taking out? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 847
142890 if someone ask me to visit their country where I do not know ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 2
142889 2025.03.06 homework! ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 936
142888 What do you think of food nowadays? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 3
142887 go shopping mall rather than take a hobby ¾î*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 5
142886 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 931
142885 What\'s the most memorable experience you have with your dental... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 920
142884 How do you feel about people who smoke near you? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 2
142883 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 838
142882 2025.03.05 homework! ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 865
142881 What was the last piece of good news you heard ? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 811
142880 3/5 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 2
142879 Some friends you met on a trip want you to visit their country.... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 848
142878 s Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 697
142877 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04