¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¼Á
2025-03-13 549

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

People have a desire that about being recognized.

Nowdays, We have living that looking into the other People of far away that due to develope of Social Network Service.

In the current of times

In the current of times, In spite of the fact that there is no problem myself

People are feeling that a relative sense of deprivation and a sense of inferiority that Looking at other people's lives.

People overspend in order to relieve that emotions.

Buying a good car and good clothes, ect items is not problem If you can afford your situation.

But I think overspending to show off my situation is prblematic even though I can't afford it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Joseph! Thanks for diligently doing your essay. I appreciate your effort. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
People have a desire that about being recognized.
>>> 
People have a natural desire to be recognized.
Nowdays, We have living that looking into the other People of far away that due to develope of Social Network Service.
>>> 
Nowadays, we live in a world where we constantly observe the lives of others, especially due to the rise of social networking services.
In the current of times, In spite of the fact that there is no problem myself
People are feeling that a relative sense of deprivation and a sense of inferiority that Looking at other people's lives.
>>>In this current age, despite having no personal issues, people often experience a sense of deprivation and inferiority when comparing their lives to others.
People overspend in order to relieve that emotions.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
OR>>>
To cope with these emotions, some people resort to overspending.
Buying a good car and good clothes, ect items is not problem If you can afford your situation.
>>>Buying a nice car, quality clothes, and other items isn¡¯t inherently problematic if it fits within your financial means.
But I think overspending to show off my situation is prblematic even though I can't afford it.
>>>However, I believe that overspending to show off or impress others becomes problematic when it¡¯s beyond what you can afford.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142223 \"Importance of Rest and Balance in a Busy Life¡° ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-01 1197
142222 Homework ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 2
142221 What do you do to easily get along with other people? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1274
142220 Organ donation is one of the best donations that people can do ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1
142219 The book that I¡¯ll introduce today is ¡®The First-time Teacher... À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 986
142218 Dear, Cathy teacher ¹è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1147
142217 Doing nothing is meaningful ÇÑ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 995
142216 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1329
142215 How do you typically protect yourself from the dust when it¡¯s... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1229
142214 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1238
142213 Do you prefer a quick goodbye or a long farewell? Why? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 997
142212 What surprised you about getting older? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 966
142211 Trump ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1533
142210 Write the best way to have a staycation during the Korean New... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1043
142209 What is your ideal summer camp? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1231
142208 Write about the most interesting summer camp you can think of. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 949
142207 How do you celebrate Seollal with your family? ÀÓ*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1447
142206 Write about the first time you were on a plane. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1259
142205 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1
142204 My introduction ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04