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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What did you all talk about while having brunch?

작성자: 노*철
2025-03-25 757

회원님의 영작문

Totally there were seven people at my mother's birthday party. (My first sister and her 25-year-old son, my younger sister and her husband, and our couple.)
My little sister has no children.
Our story topics are really diverse.
We talked a lot about life, such as our hobbies and our work life, as well as about diet and skin care, and about celebrities.
The story of my family that we always talk about is the story of two daughters studying in the United States.
My mother likes to hear from Kylie and Nikki a lot.
While eating shabu-shabu, we all had video calls with Kylie and Nikki.
There is nothing more enjoyable than seeing the face of the person we want to see.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello David, your writing effectively captures the warmth of a family gathering! I made some adjustments for clarity and natural flow, especially in phrasing and sentence structure. Keep up the great work. You’re doing well in expressing emotions through writing!

~ T. Lia

Totally there were seven people at my mother's birthday party.
>> In total, there were seven people at my mother’s birthday party.

(My first sister and her 25-year-old son, my younger sister and her husband, and our couple.)
>> (My eldest sister and her 25-year-old son, my younger sister and her husband, and my husband and me.)

My little sister has no children.
>> My younger sister has no children.

Our story topics are really diverse.
>> We talked about a wide variety of topics.

We talked a lot about life, such as our hobbies and our work life, as well as about diet and skin care, and about celebrities.
>> We had many conversations about life, including our hobbies, work, diet, skincare, and celebrities.

The story of my family that we always talk about is the story of two daughters studying in the United States.
>> A topic that always comes up in our family is the story of two daughters studying in the United States.

My mother likes to hear from Kylie and Nikki a lot.
>> My mother loves hearing from Kylie and Nikki.

While eating shabu-shabu, we all had video calls with Kylie and Nikki.
>> While enjoying shabu-shabu, we all had a video call with Kylie and Nikki.

There is nothing more enjoyable than seeing the face of the person we want to see.
>> There is nothing more enjoyable than seeing the faces of our loved ones.
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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