¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¾Æ
2025-03-27 841

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My home is on the 5th floor. I can see an elementary school right outside the window.
In summer, when the window is open, I can hear the kids playing.
It¡¯s a cheerful sound, but hearing it every day can feel like noise and it stresses me out.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isabel, your homework was well-structured and clearly expressed your thoughts. You did a great job describing your living situation and how the sounds from the school affect you. I made a small revision in the last sentence to improve the flow and make it sound more natural. Try to be mindful of transitions between ideas to ensure smooth readability. Keep up the great work, and I look forward to reading more of your homework responses.

~ T. Lia

My home is on the 5th floor. 
>> CORRECT

I can see an elementary school right outside the window.
>> CORRECT

In summer, when the window is open, I can hear the kids playing.
>> CORRECT

It¡¯s a cheerful sound, but hearing it every day can feel like noise and it stresses me out.
>> It¡¯s a cheerful sound, but hearing it every day can start to feel like noise, which stresses me out.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142671 How do you deal with major changes in your company? ¼­*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-23 876
142670 What is a perfect weekend for you? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-02-22 930
142669 What form of exercise is the most exciting for you? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-22 1063
142668 Why is it important to follow protocols? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-22 1
142667 What are your main reasons or considerations/criteria when... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1314
142666 How much transparency should the media cover when reporting or... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 907
142665 Unforgettable movies È«*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1008
142664 Why we should not judge people just by first impression ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1
142663 I don¡¯t believe that whales can sing. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1199
142662 The homework for February 20th. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1184
142661 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1128
142660 What springs to mind when you hear the term ¡®animal rights? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1047
142659 homework ±è*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1235
142658 Do you think it\'s important for kids to choose early what they... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 866
142657 What are the biggest communication problems between colleagues? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 2
142656 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1071
142655 What do you think is the most important home appliance? Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 1052
142654 What¡¯s one thing that instantly makes a tiring day feel better? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 938
142653 Do you think it¡¯s safer to travel now than in the past? °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 2
142652 2/20 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-21 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04