¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¾Æ
2025-03-27 968

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My home is on the 5th floor. I can see an elementary school right outside the window.
In summer, when the window is open, I can hear the kids playing.
It¡¯s a cheerful sound, but hearing it every day can feel like noise and it stresses me out.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isabel, your homework was well-structured and clearly expressed your thoughts. You did a great job describing your living situation and how the sounds from the school affect you. I made a small revision in the last sentence to improve the flow and make it sound more natural. Try to be mindful of transitions between ideas to ensure smooth readability. Keep up the great work, and I look forward to reading more of your homework responses.

~ T. Lia

My home is on the 5th floor. 
>> CORRECT

I can see an elementary school right outside the window.
>> CORRECT

In summer, when the window is open, I can hear the kids playing.
>> CORRECT

It¡¯s a cheerful sound, but hearing it every day can feel like noise and it stresses me out.
>> It¡¯s a cheerful sound, but hearing it every day can start to feel like noise, which stresses me out.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142132 The best gift for yongsters is to spend time together. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2025-01-23 1407
142131 How does Korean perceive political discussion? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-23 1455
142130 What kind of a leader makes a good leader? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-23 1536
142129 What are the advantages and disadvantages of talking through the... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-23 1441
142128 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 0
142127 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1041
142126 Why do some people handle waiting better than others? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1296
142125 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1
142124 I¡¯ve played Tic-Tac-Toe before. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1493
142123 Why we sometimes cannot keep deadlines ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1
142122 First essay!! ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1638
142121 I want to get a modern hanbok dress this summer! ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1742
142120 I wore a vest nowadays which my mother knitted for me! ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1365
142119 Do you think that governments should encourage public transport... ¼­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 2
142118 I want to change this answer into a couple of lines ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1367
142117 I want to change this answer into a couple of lines ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1316
142116 I want to change this answer into a couple of lines ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1168
142115 Do people decorate their homes for Lunar New Year? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 3
142114 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1734
142113 What\'s your wish for Lunar New Year? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-22 1631

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04