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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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서비스 입니다.

Have you experienced moving in ?

작성자: 박*호
2025-04-07 1094

회원님의 영작문

Yes, I have moved a lot.
When I lived in the countryside, my family never moved to other places. But after my family moved to Seoul, my family often moved to other places in Seoul.
In Korea, people living in the countryside rarely move, but people living in cities tend to move frequently because they want to move to a better place to live.
Koreans prefer places that are close to parks, schools, shopping malls and subway stations.
I will tell you about my experience of moving after getting married in 1995.
I've moved six times since I got married. and I moved to my current place 13 years ago.
My daughters and I are happy with the apartment we live in.
My apartment is in the middle of a new city, so it's a really good place to live because my office is nearby, and I can use park, shopping center, and public transportation such as the subway. So I don't plan on moving anywhere else, but after my daughters get married and leave me, I might move to the countryside where I can raise a dog.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Soon Ho^^
Thank you for sharing.
_T. SHAY^^
***
Yes, I have moved a lot.
>>Correct
OR: Yes, I did move a lot.
When I lived in the countryside, my family never moved to other places. 
>>Correct
OR: When I lived in the countryside, we only lived in one place.
But after my family moved to Seoul, my family often moved to other places in Seoul.
>>Correct
OR: However, when my family moved to Seoul, we moved to different places.
In Korea, people living in the countryside rarely move, but people living in cities tend to move frequently because they want to move to a better place to live.
>>Correct
OR: In Korea, people in the countryside tend to stay in one place, but those in cities often move to find better living conditions.
Koreans prefer places that are close to parks, schools, shopping malls and subway stations.
>>Correct
OR: Many Koreans choose to live near parks, schools, shopping centers, and subway stations for convenience.
OR: Proximity to parks, schools, malls, and public transportation is highly valued by Koreans when choosing a place to live.
I will tell you about my experience of moving after getting married in 1995.
>>Correct
OR: Let me share my experience of moving after getting married in 1995.
I've moved six times since I got married. 
>>Correct
OR: I've moved six times after getting married.
and I moved to my current place 13 years ago.
>>And I moved to my current place 13 years ago.
My daughters and I are happy with the apartment we live in.
>>Correct
OR: My daughter and I are happy with our current apartment.
My apartment is in the middle of a new city, so it's a really good place to live because my office is nearby, and I can use park, shopping center, and public transportation such as the subway. 
>>My apartment is in the middle of a new city, so it's a really good place to live because my office is nearby, and I can use the  park, shopping center, and public transportation such as the subway. 
>>Situated in the center of a newly developed city, my apartment offers an ideal living environment. It's close to my workplace and conveniently near parks, shopping facilities, and public transport, including the subway. 
So I don't plan on moving anywhere else, but after my daughters get married and leave me, I might move to the countryside where I can raise a dog.
>>Correct
OR: At the moment, I have no intention of moving. However, after my daughters marry and start their own family, I might consider relocating to the countryside and keeping a dog.

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