¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ÀÎ
2025-04-07 900

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

For behaviors whose illegality differ from the countries, such as drugs or gambling, they are mostly prescribed illegal in Korea. Therefore, there're no legal behaviors that I think should be illegal. I think the biggest problem of Korean law is that even though those laws exist, their intensity is too low. When a person take a drug or gamble they get punished but since the penalties are light they don't reflect on themselves but instead have a motivation to commit again. What is worse is that other people who watched this loose control of law become more tempted to commit a crime. In my personal opinion Korea is now being decimated by critical crimes such as drugs compare to the past.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Ms. WooIn! It's definitely a complex issue. When the consequences of illegal behavior aren¡¯t significant, it can lead to a lack of deterrence, as you mentioned. Do you think more severe penalties, along with other strategies, could help tackle these issues?
-T. Sonny
For behaviors whose illegality differ from the countries, such as drugs or gambling, they are mostly prescribed illegal in Korea. 
>>Behaviors whose legality differs from country to country, such as drug use or gambling, are mostly illegal in Korea.
Therefore, there're no legal behaviors that I think should be illegal. 
>>Therefore, there are no legal behaviors that I believe should be illegal.
I think the biggest problem of Korean law is that even though those laws exist, their intensity is too low. 
>>I think the biggest problem with Korean law is that, even though these laws exist, their enforcement is too weak.
When a person take a drug or gamble they get punished but since the penalties are light they don't reflect on themselves but instead have a motivation to commit again. 
>>When a person uses drugs or gambles, they are punished, but since the penalties are light, they don¡¯t reflect on their actions and instead are motivated to commit the crime again.
What is worse is that other people who watched this loose control of law become more tempted to commit a crime. 
>>What is worse is that other people, who observe this leniency, become more tempted to commit crimes.
In my personal opinion Korea is now being decimated by critical crimes such as drugs compare to the past.
>>In my personal opinion, Korea is now being plagued by serious crimes, such as drug use, compared to the past.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142212 What surprised you about getting older? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1290
142211 Trump ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1978
142210 Write the best way to have a staycation during the Korean New... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1377
142209 What is your ideal summer camp? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1719
142208 Write about the most interesting summer camp you can think of. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1426
142207 How do you celebrate Seollal with your family? ÀÓ*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1983
142206 Write about the first time you were on a plane. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1797
142205 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1
142204 My introduction ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 3
142203 Write about your most recent dining experience. ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1661
142202 nature ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-29 1
142201 Rice Terraces ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-29 1
142200 What\'s your ideal Korean New Year? Explain? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-28 1670
142199 Do you think traditions should be preserved and maintained? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 2125
142198 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 1
142197 When something needs fixing or changing in your house, do you do... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 0
142196 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 1676
142195 How can transportation options be convenient or inconvenient? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 2
142194 What¡¯s your favorite place to visit downtown? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 2
142193 My best dream is getting a laptop as my birthday gift from my... À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 1637

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04