¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How does God¡¯s love shape the way you see yourself and others?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-04-08 890

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

As I believed in God, I became aware of God's heart.
Until I knew God's heart, I pointed out the mistakes of others accurately and gave him advice to move on a better way.
I was able to point out others' mistakes accurately, while generously passing over my mistakes that others don¡¯t know.
However, knowing the heart of God, I was able to point out my mistakes accurately and become tolerant of others' mistakes.
That seems to be how God looks at me and others.
God has waited generously for my mistakes, so I could do the same.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David. Your reflection is deeply heartfelt and meaningful. You¡¯ve done a beautiful job expressing how your faith has shaped your perspective on yourself and others. I can feel your sincerity and growth through your words. With just a few small grammar adjustments, your message becomes even clearer. Keep writing with this honesty and humility. Your heart truly shines through.

~ T. Lia

 As I believed in God, I became aware of God's heart.
>> CORRECT

Until I knew God's heart, I pointed out the mistakes of others accurately and gave him advice to move on a better way.
>> Until I knew God's heart, I pointed out others' mistakes accurately and gave them advice to move in a better direction.

I was able to point out others' mistakes accurately, while generously passing over my mistakes that others don¡¯t know.
>> I could point out others' mistakes accurately while overlooking my own mistakes that others didn¡¯t see.

However, knowing the heart of God, I was able to point out my mistakes accurately and become tolerant of others' mistakes.
>> CORRECT

That seems to be how God looks at me and others.
>> CORRECT

God has waited generously for my mistakes, so I could do the same
>> God has patiently waited through my mistakes, so I can do the same for others.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142457 What¡¯s the most generous offer you¡¯ve ever made to someone? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 1295
142456 2/11 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 1
142455 Gifts or offerings at Korean funerals ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 1241
142454 What role does technology play in modern tourism? °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2025-02-12 2
142453 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 0
142452 Exercise in the gym or Outdoor exercise-Exercising in the gym is... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1581
142451 How would you describe your glasses to someone over the phone? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1
142450 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1197
142449 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 3
142448 Who\'s the most outstanding male you know? What makes him... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1252
142447 How long are you usually allowed to play games and not study? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1187
142446 What is your ideal family structure? ¼­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1
142445 Homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1312
142444 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1254
142443 The homework of 10th Fab. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1193
142442 > Since you have experienced being a foreign student yourself,... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1228
142441 What do you think of Mr. Yoon\'s impeachment? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1303
142440 Do you enjoy spending time alone, or do you prefer to be around... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 2
142439 Homework ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1736
142438 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-11 1472

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04