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What lessons can be learned from South Korea\'s political crisis?

작성자: 김*경
2025-04-22 679

회원님의 영작문

First of all, politicians can learn a lesson about how powerful our people are and how reasonable and energetic they have been. They shouldn’t pretend to listen to others any more. Rather, they must truly and humbly pay attention to what the other is saying. Second, they also need to know how much efforts and sacrifice it takes to blossom the democracy on this land where it used to be devastated by Korean civil war.
Third, it’s high time for Koreans to amend the constitution law so that we can change the presidential system from a single 5-year term to a renewable 4-year term. We’ve already seen the bad outcomes of a single 5-year term fully. Now, we’re at the end of our rope in politics and economy. We need to do something before Korean economy will fall down any more. Who knows? this political chaos can be a blessing in disguise in the long term. Let us look on the bright side because there should be another exit if one door closes.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Steve. You’ve written a passionate and thoughtful reflection on political reform and national resilience. Your argument is clear, and your call for action is well-supported with powerful imagery and real concerns. Just watch out for small grammar points like article use, plural forms, and word order for smoothness. Still, your voice as a writer is compelling. Keep using it to spark meaningful discussions. Excellent effort!

~ T. Lia

First of all, politicians can learn a lesson about how powerful our people are and how reasonable and energetic they have been.
>> CORRECT

They shouldn’t pretend to listen to others any more.
>> They shouldn’t pretend to listen to others anymore.

Rather, they must truly and humbly pay attention to what the other is saying.
>> Rather, they must truly and humbly pay attention to what others are saying.

Second, they also need to know how much efforts and sacrifice it takes to blossom the democracy on this land where it used to be devastated by Korean civil war.
>> Second, they also need to understand how much effort and sacrifice it takes for democracy to blossom in this land, which was once devastated by the Korean Civil War.

Third, it’s high time for Koreans to amend the constitution law so that we can change the presidential system from a single 5-year term to a renewable 4-year term.
>> Third, it’s high time for Koreans to amend the Constitution so that we can change the presidential system from a single 5-year term to a renewable 4-year term.

We’ve already seen the bad outcomes of a single 5-year term fully.
>> We’ve already fully seen the negative outcomes of a single 5-year term.

Now, we’re at the end of our rope in politics and economy.
>> Now, we’re at the end of our rope in both politics and the economy.

We need to do something before Korean economy will fall down any more.
>> We need to take action before the Korean economy declines any further.

Who knows? this political chaos can be a blessing in disguise in the long term.
>> Who knows? This political chaos might be a blessing in disguise in the long term.

Let us look on the bright side because there should be another exit if one door closes.
>> Let’s look on the bright side because there is always another door when one closes.

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