무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

People compete in sports, games, the economy, and many other areas of life. What is good and bad abo

작성자: 이*윤
2025-04-25 991

회원님의 영작문



Long time no see, teahcer!
Please, check the attached file.
Have a nice day!

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Ji Yun!
It was really nice to see you again. ^^ Thank you for doing your homework. :>
You’ve shared a thoughtful and clear perspective on both the positive and negative sides of competition. Nice job explaining your points with examples! Let’s work on organizing your ideas into clearer paragraphs and smoothing out some sentence structures to improve flow. Keep it up!

See you next time! ^^
~ Trixia

CONTENT:
The good thing about competition is that you can work on your own to compete with people, knowing your shortcomings.
- CORRECT.
>>> OR: The good thing about competition is that it allows you to work independently while recognizing your own shortcomings. 
I think the first things I need to do to win the competition can be to figure myself out. Therefore, you will be able to understand yourself, know what you are lacking, and create a posture to work on your own.
- I think the first step to succeeding in a competition is understanding yourself. By doing so, you can identify your weaknesses and develop the mindset needed to grow on your own.
But there are so many bad things about competition.
- However, there are also many negative aspects of competition.
First, you can try bad things to win the competition.
- CORRECT.
>>> OR: First, people may resort to unethical behavior just to win.
If these behaviors are further developed, illegality and corruption will become rampant and society will be unfair.
- If this becomes widespread, it can lead to corruption, illegality, and an unfair society.
Second, it will lead to distrust in all areas.
- CORRECT.
>>> OR: Second, excessive competition can lead to distrust.
If competition intesifies, you won't be able to trust people and make real friends that are important, especially for teenagers.
- You may find it hard to trust others or build genuine friendships, which is especially harmful for teenagers.
Third, hierarchies may be created among people.
- CORRECT.
Those who win the competition can be recognized as upper classes, those who lose the competition can be recognized as lower classes, and can be solidfied with solid ideas. 
- Winners may be viewed as superior, while those who lose may be seen as inferior.
If these ideas are fixed, you will see disrespect and arrogance in people in the upper classes, and people in the lower classes will have the qualifications they have.
- If these ideas are fixed, you will see disrespectfulness and arrogance in people in the upper classes, and people in the lower classes will have the qualifications they have.
 Moreover, they can ruin themselves or make them sick, and they'll become a very bad factor in society.
- This may cause people to feel discouraged, harm their mental health, or even lead to self-destruction—becoming a serious issue for society.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
142221 What do you do to easily get along with other people? 이*윤 완료 2025-01-31 1752
142220 Organ donation is one of the best donations that people can do 김*우 완료 2025-01-31 1
142219 The book that I’ll introduce today is ‘The First-time Teacher... 유*빈 완료 2025-01-31 1422
142218 Dear, Cathy teacher 배*빈 완료 2025-01-31 1576
142217 Doing nothing is meaningful 한*원 완료 2025-01-31 1393
142216 Homework & Question 이*주 완료 2025-01-31 1747
142215 How do you typically protect yourself from the dust when it’s... 노*철 완료 2025-01-31 1695
142214 Homework 이*민 완료 2025-01-31 1748
142213 Do you prefer a quick goodbye or a long farewell? Why? 임*미 완료 2025-01-31 1622
142212 What surprised you about getting older? 박*진 완료 2025-01-31 1369
142211 Trump 권*희 완료 2025-01-30 2116
142210 Write the best way to have a staycation during the Korean New... 차*진 완료 2025-01-30 1444
142209 What is your ideal summer camp? 차*진 완료 2025-01-30 1845
142208 Write about the most interesting summer camp you can think of. 차*진 완료 2025-01-30 1527
142207 How do you celebrate Seollal with your family? 임*비 완료 2025-01-30 2085
142206 Write about the first time you were on a plane. 차*진 완료 2025-01-30 1855
142205 Homework 김*우 완료 2025-01-30 1
142204 My introduction 신*호 완료 2025-01-30 3
142203 Write about your most recent dining experience. 박*진 완료 2025-01-30 1740
142202 nature 민*정 완료 2025-01-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]