¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why is fast food so popular?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿î
2025-05-06 731

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I love fast food as much as slow food. I think many people like fast food because of quickness, taste.
And There are many franchise all around the world. So If we travel strange country, When we hard to eat strange food,
we can choose fast food. It's almost full-proof.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Gonnie!
Thank you for your great effort! You shared clear and interesting ideas. Just a quick tip: be careful with word choice (like ¡°foolproof¡± instead of ¡°full-proof¡±) and sentence structure, try to avoid starting too many sentences with ¡°And¡± or ¡°So.¡± Keep practicing! you¡¯re doing really well!


I love fast food as much as slow food. 
>>CORRECT!
I think many people like fast food because of quickness, taste.
>>I think many people like fast food because of its quickness and taste.
And There are many franchise all around the world. So If we travel strange country, When we hard to eat strange food, we can choose fast food. 
>>There are many franchises all around the world, so if we travel to a foreign country and find it hard to eat unfamiliar food, we can choose fast food.
It's almost full-proof.
>>It's almost foolproof.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144671 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-19 180
144670 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-19 248
144669 0618 IELTS writing Task1 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 0
144668 Do you think visiting new places is more enjoyable alone or with... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 239
144667 homework ¹Ú*¿í ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 222
144666 How does waking up early affect productivity? Explain. ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 241
144665 Homework ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 2
144664 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 0
144663 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 2
144662 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 213
144661 How is our accent affected by our birthplace? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 268
144660 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 195
144659 No, I don\'t want to try banana ketchup. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 239
144658 What can younger people learn from spending more time with older... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 209
144657 The economy is always a significant concern. How is the Korean... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 217
144656 How would you feel if someone canceled on you at the last minute? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 237
144655 What is the best local event or festival in your country? Why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 219
144654 Homework. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 1
144653 food price ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 284
144652 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-18 212

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04