무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

In your view, is it possible to have both a fulfilling career and a happy family life in the current

작성자: 김*경
2025-05-14 461

회원님의 영작문

Yes, it is possible to have both of them because of three factors as followed:
First, remote work, hybrid schedules, and flexible hours have become more common, especially after the COVID-19 pandemic. This allows parents to better integrate work and family responsibilities. Secondly, more people are redefining success to include meaningful relationships, especially between family members — not just income or title at work. This cultural shift and the change of perception makes it more easy to prioritize family over work. Lastly, There’s growing awareness around parental leave and work-life balance at work. Some companies actively support employees with childcare benefits.
However, as I mentioned above, it is possible but not automatic. It requires more, such as a supportive partner, workplace that values work-life balance, and time management skills. Above all, what you define fulfilling and happy life is most important because it can shape our life’s happiness and purpose to live.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Steve, 
Thank you for taking the time to answer this essay. :)
I totally agree with you on this! I hope that a better work setup is accessible to all the employees worldwide. 
- Teacher Elly~


Yes, it is possible to have both of them because of three factors as followed:
>> Yes, it is possible to have both of them because of the following three factors:
OR >> Yes, it is possible to have both of them if these three factors are followed: 

First, remote work, hybrid schedules, and flexible hours have become more common, especially after the COVID-19 pandemic. 
>> CORRECT

This allows parents to better integrate work and family responsibilities. 
>> CORRECT

Secondly, more people are redefining success to include meaningful relationships, especially between family members — not just income or title at work. 
>> CORRECT
OR >> Secondly, more people are redefining success to include meaningful relationships, especially among family members, and not just income or job title.

This cultural shift and the change of perception makes it more easy to prioritize family over work. 
>> This cultural shift and the change of perception make it easier to prioritize family over work. 

Lastly, There’s growing awareness around parental leave and work-life balance at work. Some companies actively support employees with childcare benefits.
>> Lastly, there’s growing awareness around parental leave and work-life balance at work. Some companies actively support employees with childcare benefits.
OR >> Lastly, there is a growing awareness of parental leave and work-life balance in the workplace. Some companies actively support employees by offering childcare benefits

However, as I mentioned above, it is possible but not automatic. It requires more, such as a supportive partner, workplace that values work-life balance, and time management skills. 
>> However, as I mentioned above, it is possible but not automatic. It requires more, such as a supportive partner, a workplace that values work-life balance, and time management skills. 
OR >> However, as mentioned above, it is possible but not automatic. It requires additional factors, such as a supportive partner, a workplace that values work-life balance, and strong time management skills.

Above all, what you define fulfilling and happy life is most important because it can shape our life’s happiness and purpose to live.
>> Above all, how you define a fulfilling and happy life is most important, as it shapes your sense of happiness and purpose.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
142359 Homework & Question 이*주 완료 2025-02-07 1283
142358 How do you keep your hand relaxed while playing? 노*철 완료 2025-02-07 1418
142357 How do you manage your time with a very busy schedule? 김*규 완료 2025-02-07 0
142356 Talk about an interesting culture that you learned or... 박*호 완료 2025-02-07 1541
142355 2/6 Homework 권*빈 완료 2025-02-07 1
142354 If you could meet any famous person, who would it be and why? 박*진 완료 2025-02-07 1262
142353 Does a buffet promote overconsumption? 박*진 완료 2025-02-07 1176
142352 What is the best part of celebrating Lunar New Year? 박*진 완료 2025-02-07 1114
142351 What is the importance of social activities? 박*진 완료 2025-02-07 1289
142350 How significant is keeping these manufacturing plants in Mexico... 문*현 완료 2025-02-07 1219
142349 HOMEWORK 김*진 완료 2025-02-07 0
142348 Homework 오*봄 완료 2025-02-06 2
142347 Waking up early vs waking up late 손*희 완료 2025-02-06 1133
142346 My childhood memories in Suwon 홍*은 완료 2025-02-06 1514
142345 homework 김*연 완료 2025-02-06 1235
142344 Future travel plan 홍*은 완료 2025-02-06 1074
142343 Homework 김*우 완료 2025-02-06 1
142342 What are the other disadvantages of talking on the phone? 진*호 완료 2025-02-06 3
142341 homework 이*숙 완료 2025-02-06 1221
142340 What is work-life balance and why is it important? 송*훈 완료 2025-02-06 1337

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]