¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: Is pollution a big problem in your city? Explain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¼ö
2025-05-23 711

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

For the past couple of decades, air pollution has been a big problem in Korea including my hometown, Daejeon.
According to 'City and Natures', one of the most renowned academic journals in Korea, over 55% of the residents, who live in the country apart from the southern-west region, replied that they have moaned under the inconvenience caused by having to wear a mask to avoid contaminated air. It shows how strongly air pollution affects our daily life.
Especially in Daejeon, there are many factories on working in Daedeok industrial complex. It deteriorates nearby atmosphere.
To overcome the problem, we should seek effective ways to improve it. In my opinion, one effective way is to enact the laws which regulate the level of emissions of the factories by imposing an environmental tax to them. By doing so, we could make our community a more pleasant place to live.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isaac!
This is great effort.
You are showing the way you express yourslef.
Learn form your mistakes and apply what you learned.
Focus on the correct expressions to use in specific situations.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
For the past couple of decades, air pollution has been a big problem in Korea including my hometown, Daejeon.
>> Correct
According to 'City and Natures', one of the most renowned academic journals in Korea, over 55% of the residents, who live in the country apart from the southern-west region, replied that they have moaned under the inconvenience caused by having to wear a mask to avoid contaminated air. 
>> According to 'City and Natures', one of the most renowned academic journals in Korea, over 55% of the residents, who live in the country apart from the southern-west region, stated that they have suffered the inconvenience caused by having to wear a mask to avoid contaminated air. 
It shows how strongly air pollution affects our daily life.
>> Correct
Especially in Daejeon, there are many factories on working in Daedeok industrial complex. 
>> This is true especially in Daejeon where there are many factories  in Daedeok industrial complex. 
It deteriorates nearby atmosphere.
>> It causes the deterioration of the atmosphere.
To overcome the problem, we should seek effective ways to improve it. 
>> To overcome the problem, we should seek effective ways to improve our environment.
In my opinion, one effective way is to enact the laws which regulate the level of emissions of the factories by imposing an environmental tax to them. 
>> In my opinion, one effective way is to enact laws which regulate the level of emissions of factories by imposing an environmental tax on them. 
By doing so, we could make our community a more pleasant place to live.
>> Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144714 If you could organize a workshop, what topic would you choose? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-22 1
144713 How much time should someone spend on his hobby? À±*¿ø ÁøÇàÁß 2025-06-22 0
144712 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-21 155
144711 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-21 0
144710 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-21 0
144709 What do you think is the best way to build a closer relationship... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 180
144708 What do you think makes a visitor feel welcome? Explain. ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 224
144707 test Te*002 ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 0
144706 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 199
144705 Who do you want to meet one day? why? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 180
144704 Do you think flexible work hours would benefit most people? Why... Á¶*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 188
144703 Homework. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 4
144702 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 306
144701 I smile a lot a day. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 170
144700 ¤Ó¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 165
144699 Homework ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 4
144698 burget ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 187
144697 Knowing the artist\'s background ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 147
144696 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 136
144695 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 209

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04