¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What skills would you like to learn in the future? Explain

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¼ö
2025-05-29 266

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

A skill I would like to learn is how to treat people and influence society in a good way. Once I read a book entitled How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, which made me believe that it is vital to have good relationships with other people. I think the skill cannot be acquired just by understanding related knowledge, but only through many experiences. I originally studied aerospace engineering. Although the name of the subject seems to have many chances to influence people's lives, later I realized the industry is actually very conservative and hard to feel direct achievement because even small innovations can result in serious risks. So I changed my dream of influencing the world not through technological advancement but through more direct ways such as business. It would be more suitable for my personality and creative style. In conclusion, I would like to learn business management skills, especially related to global issues and humanity in the future.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isaac!
Please take note of connectors and punctuation marks.
I love reading about your ideas.
Keep practicing!^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
A skill I would like to learn is how to treat people and influence society in a good way. 
>> Correct
Once I read a book entitled How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, which made me believe that it is vital to have good relationships with other people. 
>> Correct
I think the skill cannot be acquired just by understanding related knowledge, but only through many experiences. 
>> I think this skill can't be acquired just by understanding the related knowledge but it actually takes a lot of experience.
I originally studied aerospace engineering. 
>> Correct
Although the name of the subject seems to have many chances to influence people's lives, later I realized the industry is actually very conservative and hard to feel direct achievement because even small innovations can result in serious risks. 
>> Although the name of the subject suggests it affords many chances to influence people's lives, I later realized that the industry is actually very conservative and it's hard to feel direct achievement because even small innovations can result in serious risks. 
So I changed my dream of influencing the world not through technological advancement but through more direct ways such as business. 
>> So I changed my dream of influencing the world, not through technological advancement but through more direct ways, such as business. 
In conclusion, I would like to learn business management skills, especially related to global issues and humanity in the future.
>> In conclusion, I would like to learn business management skills, especially those related to global issues and humanity in the future.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144153 Do doctors have a duty to serve the country before their... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 424
144152 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 333
144151 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 367
144150 5/14 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144149 5/15 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144148 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144147 5/16 Himework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144146 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 1
144145 What are some common mistakes people make during emergency calls? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 0
144144 What is your dream job? Á¶*¸® ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 356
144143 What is the best surprise you ever had? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-05-17 390
144142 Have you ever prepared a full course (appetizer, main dish,... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 2
144141 Do you think that your country is changing rapidly? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 347
144140 Please call this number 010 3559 2141 ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 416
144139 homework ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 370
144138 The homework for 16th May. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 401
144137 Homework ¹Ú*¿í ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 345
144136 What food will you \"NEVER\" eat? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 1
144135 I like watermelon. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 374
144134 D4 essay homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 386

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04