¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What type of leadership style do you think is most effective in fostering a productive and healthy w

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*¿µ
2025-05-30 109

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I feel like that it depends on some situations or steps.
For example, in my company team's case,
I think the leader have to be restrict,
because we are dealing with many kind of parmartuerical procducts.
It have to control under fixed temperature and deliver to certain customers.
So we must practice all task and work following regular SOP.
However, I prefer people with humanity.

Hello Elly.
I was happy, today.
Tomorrow, I'm going to go Seoul for meeting my friends of the university.
So, I went to the shopping mall with my son and brought some clothes, today.
Of course, I brough a pair of shoes and T-shirts for my son and husband,
because they might be angry, if I didn't buy it for them.
They was happy and thanks for my plans.
It's a friday.
Have a nice weekend.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Stella, 
Thanks, as always, for taking the time to answer this essay. :)
I totally agree with you because l
eading with humanity means guiding others with kindness, empathy, and respect. I strongly believe that everyone must be respected regardless of their rank and position in the company. 
Wow! I hope you had a great time with your university friends. I¡¯m also happy to hear that you bought something for yourself. I¡¯m sure your son and husband are happy too; everybody¡¯s happy! I hope you had a wonderful day today. Wishing you a less stressful week! :)

- Teacher Elly~



I feel like that it depends on some situations or steps.

>> I feel like it depends on the situation or the steps involved.

OR >> I think it depends on the situation or the specific steps.


For example, in my company team's case, I think the leader have to be restrict, because we are dealing with many kind of parmartuerical procducts.

>> For example, in my company's team, I think the leader has to be strict because we are dealing with many kinds of pharmaceutical products.


It have to control under fixed temperature and deliver to certain customers.

>> It has to be kept under a fixed temperature and delivered to certain customers.


So we must practice all task and work following regular SOP.

>> So we must perform all tasks and work according to the regular SOP.


However, I prefer people with humanity.

>> However, I prefer leaders who act with humanity.

OR >> However, I prefer a leadership style that shows humanity.


Hello Elly.

>> Hello, Elly. 


I was happy, today.

>> I was happy today.

OR >> Today, I was happy.


Tomorrow, I'm going to go Seoul for meeting my friends of the university.

>> Tomorrow, I'm going to Seoul to meet my university friends.


So, I went to the shopping mall with my son and brought some clothes, today.

>> So, I went to the shopping mall with my son and bought some clothes today.


Of course, I brough a pair of shoes and T-shirts for my son and husband, because they might be angry, if I didn't buy it for them.

>> Of course, I bought a pair of shoes and T-shirts for my son and husband because they might have been angry if I didn¡¯t buy them.

OR >> Of course, I bought a pair of shoes and T-shirts for my son and husband because they might be angry if I didn¡¯t buy them anything.


They was happy and thanks for my plans.

>>They were happy and thankful for my plans.


It's a friday.

>> It's a Friday. 

OR >> It's Friday.
 

Have a nice weekend.

>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144379 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 100
144378 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 94
144377 Do you like attending festivals? Have you ever participated in a... Á¶*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 106
144376 Does believing in superstitions save you from bad luck? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 107
144375 Homework ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 1
144374 D7 essay homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 104
144373 How would you feel if someone canceled on you at the last minute? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 0
144372 What are your greatest professional strengths? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 0
144371 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 123
144370 homework ¹Ú*¿í ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 111
144369 My favorite athlete is Usain St. Leo Bolt. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-05-30 116
144368 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 1
144367 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144366 ¼÷Á¦ ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 117
144365 >> What are your thoughts on the drinking culture in Korean... ±è*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 134
144364 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 1
144363 At would age would like to become independent from your parents?... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 109
144362 What are your thoughts on voice acting culture in China? ÀÓ* ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 2
144361 The economy is always an important issue. How is the Korean... ÀÓ* ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144360 Why do people have hobbies? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04