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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How do you treat yourself to make yourself feel better when the weather is bad? Explain.

작성자: 조*수
2025-06-03 484

회원님의 영작문

I love bright and cozy weather with mild temperatures and fresh air. It is essential for me to get some sunshine every day even if it is just for a while. This makes my mind more positive and mentally active. However, I sometimes encounter bad weather and it influences my daily mood and thoughts. When I was a teenager, not emotionally grounded, I was easily affected by gloomy weather. For example, the rainy season in summer or persistent cloudy days in winter made me feel depressed. I wished I could control my feelings and learn how to effectively cope with bad moods. I started to broaden my hobbies and activities such as playing instruments, exploring new genres of books or movies, trying leisure activities I had never done before. These efforts really helped me stay mentally stable not only during bad weather but also slump time. It is still the same these days. For one example, I sometimes enjoy looking at small ornaments like a candle to comfort myself on rainy days.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Isaac!
You don't have to worry.
You are definitely getting better at making sentences.
It's a gradual process.
So, keep trying.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I love bright and cozy weather with mild temperatures and fresh air. 
>> Correct
It is essential for me to get some sunshine every day even if it is just for a while. 
>> Correct
This makes my mind more positive and mentally active. 
>> Correct
However, I sometimes encounter bad weather and it influences my daily mood and thoughts. 
>> Correct
When I was a teenager, not emotionally grounded, I was easily affected by gloomy weather. 
>> When I was a teenager and not emotionally grounded, I was easily affected by gloomy weather.
For example, the rainy season in summer or persistent cloudy days in winter made me feel depressed. 
>> Correct
I wished I could control my feelings and learn how to effectively cope with bad moods. 
>> I wished I could have controlled my feelings and learned how to cope effectively with bad moods.
I started to broaden my hobbies and activities such as playing instruments, exploring new genres of books or movies, trying leisure activities I had never done before. 
>> I started to broaden my hobbies and activities such as playing instruments, exploring new genres of books or movies and trying leisure activities I had never done before. 
These efforts really helped me stay mentally stable not only during bad weather but also slump time. 
>> These efforts really helped me stay mentally stable not only during bad weather but also during those times I felt that I was in a slump. 
It is still the same these days. 
>> Correct
For one example, I sometimes enjoy looking at small ornaments like a candle to comfort myself on rainy days.
>> For example, I sometimes enjoy looking at small ornaments like a candle to comfort myself on rainy days.
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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
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04

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