무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Do you think technology makes life easier or more complicated? Explain

작성자: 조*수
2025-06-04 485

회원님의 영작문

I think that technology makes our lives more complicated even though technology has brought convenience to people. However, I am not optimistic about the future of humanity. Let's take smartphones. Since the 2010s, when they became widespread, most people have become bound to them. Also, perhaps it is because I am living in Korea, paradoxically contemporary people tend to work more busily and remain tied to their labor despite the development of technology. Those lives seem far from happiness. Cutting-edge technologies have some problems too. Biotechnology and automated processes have several side effects. So it will be more important to pursue happiness, meanings in life than only seeking and competing for technologies. I often yearn for those lives like Bach, Tycho Brahe and shepherds. Their lives were really peaceful - playing the harpsichord or living in nature during the day and looking up at the sky to admire constellations every night, not competing for development and success.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Isaac!
Good job on your descriptions today.
You were able to paint a picture of your ideas.
We just need to polish some patterns and we're good to go^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I think that technology makes our lives more complicated even though technology has brought convenience to people. 
>> Correct
However, I am not optimistic about the future of humanity. 
>> Correct
Let's take smartphones. 
>> Let's take smartphones as an example. 
Since the 2010s, when they became widespread, most people have become bound to them. 
>> Since the 2010s, when they became widespread, most people have become dependent on them. 
Also, perhaps it is because I am living in Korea, paradoxically contemporary people tend to work more busily and remain tied to their labor despite the development of technology. 
>> Also, perhaps it is because I am living in Korea, paradoxically contemporary people here tend to work more busily and remain tied to their labor despite the development of technology. 
Those lives seem far from happiness. 
>> Those lives seem distant from happiness. 
Cutting-edge technologies have some problems too. 
>> Correct
Biotechnology and automated processes have several side effects. 
>> Correct
So it will be more important to pursue happiness, meanings in life than only seeking and competing for technologies. 
>> So it will be more important to pursue happiness and meaning in life than to seek more advanced technologies.
I often yearn for those lives like Bach, Tycho Brahe and shepherds. 
>> I often yearn for lives like those of Bach, Tycho Brahe and shepherds. 
Their lives were really peaceful - playing the harpsichord or living in nature during the day and looking up at the sky to admire constellations every night, not competing for development and success.
>> Correct
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
143503 s 조*희 완료 2025-04-08 1111
143502 Whenever you want 임*준 완료 2025-04-08 982
143501 homework 김*우 완료 2025-04-08 1
143500 How do you stay organized when you have a lot of tasks to do? 윤*인 완료 2025-04-08 2
143499 Do you think public transport should be free for everyone? 조*명 완료 2025-04-08 4
143498 My homework 이*도 완료 2025-04-08 1005
143497 Do you consider yourself knowledgeable about current events? Why... 이*태 완료 2025-04-08 1201
143496 homework 이*아 완료 2025-04-08 1168
143495 How does God’s love shape the way you see yourself and others? 노*철 완료 2025-04-08 1083
143494 Homework 이*민 완료 2025-04-08 1168
143493 Why do you think that the lack of time still yields average... 송*진 완료 2025-04-08 1
143492 How do you choose the person you vote during the election ? 박*호 완료 2025-04-08 1004
143491 How do you adjust your routine when unexpected things happen? 이*태 완료 2025-04-08 968
143490 Do you think it\'s important for kids to choose early what they... 이*태 완료 2025-04-08 923
143489 What is the greatest lesson you have learned from a book or a... 이*태 완료 2025-04-08 798
143488 s 조*희 완료 2025-04-08 1118
143487 What day is the most important to you? 한*원 완료 2025-04-08 863
143486 4/7 Homework 권*빈 완료 2025-04-08 1
143485 . 김*인 완료 2025-04-07 917
143484 homework 김*은 완료 2025-04-07 1131

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]