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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How can advertisements influence people’s shopping habits? Explain.

작성자: 조*수
2025-06-05 458

회원님의 영작문

The purpose of advertisements is to attract people to buy their products. Companies seeking profit use stimulating advertising techniques. However, they sometimes deceive customers about a product's performance, which causes several social problems. According to one newspaper, younger people are especially susceptible to incorrect information in the ads. Recently, sellers have been using social media that is not regulated by law. There are few policies about misleading ads. Also, although adverts don't include any wrong information, they can confuse people about whether they really need something or not. Overall, the more people exposed to ads, the more they tend to spend on shopping. I hope that you make a judicious choice whenever you need to purchase items and feel inevitably influenced by ads. There would be also surely helpful and advantageous aspects of the ads. So If you wisely distinguish essential things from unnecessary ones, you can manage your spending more effectively.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Isaac!
You got the point perfectly.
I always appreciate your efforts.
Great job!^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
The purpose of advertisements is to attract people to buy their products. 
>> The purpose of advertisements is to attract people to buy products. 
Companies seeking profit use stimulating advertising techniques. 
>> Correct
However, they sometimes deceive customers about a product's performance, which causes several social problems. 
>> Correct
According to one newspaper, younger people are especially susceptible to incorrect information in the ads. 
>> Correct
Recently, sellers have been using social media that is not regulated by law. 
>> Recently, sellers have been using social media to advertise which can be risky since it is not regulated by law. 
There are few policies about misleading ads. 
>> Correct
Also, although adverts don't include any wrong information, they can confuse people about whether they really need something or not. 
>> Correct
Overall, the more people exposed to ads, the more they tend to spend on shopping. 
>> Correct
I hope that you make a judicious choice whenever you need to purchase items and feel inevitably influenced by ads. 
>> Correct
There would be also surely helpful and advantageous aspects of the ads. 
>> Of course, there could also be helpful and advantageous aspects of ads. 
So If you wisely distinguish essential things from unnecessary ones, you can manage your spending more effectively.
>> So if you wisely distinguish essential things from unnecessary ones, you can manage your spending more effectively.
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