¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK FOR 06/05 Writing Task: How do your interests affect your goals?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¿¬
2025-06-05 36

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Writing Task: How do your interests affect your goals?

To be honest, interests sometimes make it harder to achieve my goals. Enjoying interests is good, but it is bad to be addicted. It could disturb me to focus on the goal. That¡¯s why I think self controlling is one of the most important strengths to get what you want.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

I see what you mean, Lily!

Interests are fun, but they can be distracting. I agree that balance is important, enjoying your interests can be motivating, but too much can become a distraction.

- Kristine ^^ 

To be honest, interests sometimes make it harder to achieve my goals.
>> Honestly, my interests can sometimes get in the way of reaching my goals.
Enjoying interests is good, but it is bad to be addicted.
>> It's good to enjoy your interests, but getting addicted to them can be harmful.
It could disturb me to focus on the goal.
>> It could distract me from focusing on my goals.
That¡¯s why I think self controlling is one of the most important strengths to get what you want.
>> That¡¯s why I believe self-control is one of the key strengths needed to reach your goals.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144347 earlier ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 1
144346 Meeting new person ±Ç*°æ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 2
144345 brand coffee ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144344 breakfast ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144343 my day ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144342 ¼÷Á¦ ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 279
144341 How can a company encourage better attendance without being too... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144340 Homework ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 264
144339 Why is it important to follow company policies when dealing with... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144338 How can employees make customers feel welcome? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 0
144337 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 268
144336 Why do you want to work for us? (What can you bring to our... ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 2
144335 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-29 1
144334 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 1
144333 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 2
144332 Which do you prefer: more money or increased popularity? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 302
144331 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 276
144330 Do you enjoy your birthdays? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 0
144329 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 265
144328 What is the best local event or festival in your country? Why? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-05-28 261

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04