무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

In your opinion, what can be done to prevent wars from breaking out in the first place ?

작성자: 오*영
2025-06-12 145

회원님의 영작문

I think that this is equal with in a family.
If we can understand each other and considerate the other one,
If we admit that we are different person,
I think we don't have any fights, and it won't be exist to create wars in the world.
But they are always trying to give some proof which is right to each other.
Also they are wanting to win all aspects.
However we can live well when we can collaborate with others.
We have to remember that we cannot live alone.


Hello Elly.
There was party in my town, yesterday.
So It had an machine to pick up some items if we put in a coin.
My son is really like this machine but I usually permit to try only under 5000 won.
However he didn't need to control from mom, because I wasn't here.
He called and informed me that spent all his money to pick it up in the machine.
But I couldn't yell him because he was happy.
I feel like too long a day, but It's too short a week.
It is coming closely this Friday.
See you in this class.
Thank you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Stella,
Once again, thank you for taking the time to respond to this essay. :)
I really appreciate your perspective, it’s thoughtful and meaningful. I truly hope there will be no more wars anywhere in the world. Instead, we should all focus on love and peace. If we do, I believe our world can become beautiful again. 
That’s awesome! I enjoy playing claw machines too! I'm glad to hear your son had a great time at the party yesterday.
Hang in there! Just one more day to go! You've got this! :)
- Teacher Elly~


I think that this is equal with in a family.
>> I think this is the same as in a family.
 
If we can understand each other and considerate the other one, If we admit that we are different person, I think we don't have any fights, and it won't be exist to create wars in the world.
>> If we can understand each other and be considerate of one another, and if we admit that we are different people, I think we wouldn't fight, and wars wouldn't exist in the world.

But they are always trying to give some proof which is right to each other.
>> But they are always trying to prove that they are right to each other.

Also they are wanting to win all aspects.
>> They also want to win in every aspect.

However we can live well when we can collaborate with others.
>> However, we can live well when we collaborate with others.

We have to remember that we cannot live alone.
>> CORRECT

Hello Elly.
>> Hello, Elly.

There was party in my town, yesterday.
>> There was a party in my town yesterday.
 
So It had an machine to pick up some items if we put in a coin.
>> There was a machine where you could pick up items by inserting a coin.

My son is really like this machine but I usually permit to try only under 5000 won.
>> My son really likes this kind of machine, but I usually only permit him to spend up to 5,000 won.
OR >> My son really likes this kind of machine, but I usually only allow him to spend up to 5,000 won.

However he didn't need to control from mom, because I wasn't here.
>> However, he didn’t need to be controlled by me, because I wasn’t there.

He called and informed me that spent all his money to pick it up in the machine.
>> He called and told me that he spent all his money trying to get something from the machine.
OR >> He called and informed me that he spent all his money trying to get something from the machine.

But I couldn't yell him because he was happy.
>> But I couldn’t scold him because he was happy.

I feel like too long a day, but It's too short a week.
>> The days feel too long, but the week feels too short.

It is coming closely this Friday.
>> Friday is coming soon.

See you in this class.
>> See you in class.
OR >> See you later in our class.

Thank you.
>> CORRECT
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
144203 Homework 김*우 완료 2025-05-20 3
144202 What is your favorite activity to do in your free time? 여*찬 완료 2025-05-20 0
144201 ㅣ 조*희 완료 2025-05-20 526
144200 Do you have any specific rules or guidelines for visitors 진*호 완료 2025-05-20 2
144199 Aside from car purchase discounts, what are the typical benefits... 이*훈 완료 2025-05-20 589
144198  I heard that trot singing competitions are popular TV... 진*호 완료 2025-05-20 2
144197 The homework for 20th May. 조*호 완료 2025-05-20 606
144196 Do you think phone calls are better than face-to-face... 윤*인 완료 2025-05-20 0
144195 What\'s the most infamous international organization in the... 임* 완료 2025-05-20 2
144194 Do you think winning is more about skill, luck, or perseverance?... 진*호 완료 2025-05-20 1
144193 In what situations is a live broadcast more effective than a... 진*호 완료 2025-05-20 1
144192 Tell me about your visit to Greece. Talk about the Acropolis of... 이*희 완료 2025-05-20 1
144191 No, I don\'t believe in fairies. 유*빈 완료 2025-05-20 560
144190 tattoo 민*정 완료 2025-05-20 1
144189 acts/actress 민*정 완료 2025-05-20 1
144188 Homework 김*님 완료 2025-05-20 604
144187 homework 이*민 완료 2025-05-20 663
144186 Yes, I like Mickey Mouse. 유*빈 완료 2025-05-20 584
144185 0516 IELTS writing Task2 homework 송*유 완료 2025-05-20 0
144184 . 김*인 완료 2025-05-19 518

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]