¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How can Korean society be more diverse?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Áø
2025-06-17 99

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Korean society can be more diverse by including foreigners into their community and respecting each other¡¯s culture. Comparing to other countries such as America, Korean Society doesn¡¯t have many foreigners in it. If Korean society gather foreigners and their own citizen together and create a mood that everyone respect each other, we can make more diverse society.
Also if Korean culture adopted to global cultures and accept more things, it would make other foreigners to feel more inclusive.
In conclusion to make Korean society, more diverse, we should include more foreigners and respect each other

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Eugene!

Korean society can be more diverse by including foreigners into their community and respecting each other¡¯s culture. 
>>>  correct  
>>> ORKorean society can be more diverse by including foreigners into their community and respecting each other¡¯s cultures. 
Comparing to other countries such as America, Korean Society doesn¡¯t have many foreigners in it. 
>>>    correct   
If Korean society gather foreigners and their own citizen together and create a mood that everyone respect each other, we can make more diverse society.
>>>   If Korean society gathers foreigners and their own citizen together and create a mood where everyone respects each other, we can make a more diverse society.
Also if Korean culture adopted to global cultures and accept more things, it would make other foreigners to feel more inclusive.
>>>  correct      
In conclusion to make Korean society, more diverse, we should include more foreigners and respect each other.
>>>    correct    
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144480 Homework ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 3
144479 No, I don\'t want to be firefighter. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 146
144478 Homework ±è*¿î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 1
144477 Homework ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 2
144476 Do you compare yourself to others? ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 984
144475 My favorite local trip ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 183
144474 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-06-06 2
144473 Homework ±è*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 175
144472 If you are going to build a statue for someone, who would it be... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 135
144471 Do you know how good your eyesightis? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 186
144470 test Á¤*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 1
144469 . ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 0
144468 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 188
144467 Should parents monitor what websites their children are... ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 0
144466 HOMEWORK FOR 06/05 Writing Task: How do your interests affect... ½Å*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 195
144465 How can advertisements influence people¡¯s shopping habits?... Á¶*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 374
144464 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 0
144463 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 231
144462 ¼÷Á¦ ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 232
144461 Do you believe animals experience trauma the same way humans do? ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-05 182

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04