¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think makes a visitor feel welcome? Explain.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¼ö
2025-06-19 513

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is important to make acquaintances or guests feel comfortable and welcome when they visit your home. There may be various ways to satisfy visitors. However, one of the most essential elements is heartfelt sincerity. Let's suppose that you are invited to someone's home. Even though you are served delicious food and given a perfect room for the night, you might still want to leave if the host displays unpleasant behavior such as being unkind and emotionally distant. Similarly, imagine that you are traveling to new places or countries. Although those attractions may fall short of your expectations and you are exposed to some uncomfortable situations, you may still remember the experience positively for a long time, if people there kindly welcome you and leave a positive impression. In conclusion, touching someone's heart is not about offering material things, but about showing genuine kindness.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isaac!
There is a better way to express one idea in this composition.
Please review.
We can discuss later in class.
You did well again today.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
It is important to make acquaintances or guests feel comfortable and welcome when they visit your home. 
>> Correct
There may be various ways to satisfy visitors. 
>> There may be various ways to do that.
However, one of the most essential elements is heartfelt sincerity. 
>> Correct
Let's suppose that you are invited to someone's home. 
>> Correct
Even though you are served delicious food and given a perfect room for the night, you might still want to leave if the host displays unpleasant behavior such as being unkind and emotionally distant. 
>> Correct
Similarly, imagine that you are traveling to new places or countries. 
>> Correct
Although those attractions may fall short of your expectations and you are exposed to some uncomfortable situations, you may still remember the experience positively for a long time, if people there kindly welcome you and leave a positive impression. 
>> Correct
In conclusion, touching someone's heart is not about offering material things, but about showing genuine kindness.
>> Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142884 How do you feel about people who smoke near you? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 2
142883 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 1092
142882 2025.03.05 homework! ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 1141
142881 What was the last piece of good news you heard ? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 1117
142880 3/5 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 2
142879 Some friends you met on a trip want you to visit their country.... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 1128
142878 s Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-06 1012
142877 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 0
142876 Do you think gender equality has improved in recent years? Why... ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 2
142875 hello Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 935
142874 What kind of design or theme would you like your room to have? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 1152
142873 advice for someone to looking for true friends Á¶*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 1100
142872 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 1080
142871 Homework ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 979
142870 My favorite tropical fruit is ¡®mango¡¯. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 1007
142869 homework ¾ç*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 3
142868 The homework for March 4th. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 958
142867 Who is the greatest founder of a company that you know? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 3
142866 Who among your family members loves eating the most? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 1
142865 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-05 1036

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04