¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Describe the main problems that people face living in the modern world.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¼ö
2025-07-01 224

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Although not everyone is the same in every culture, I would like to discuss a social problem that is particularly noticeable in Korea. Koreans today are living in a society obsessed with competition and sameness. Korea may be a developed country, but when it comes to the question of whether it is a happy one, I don't think I can give a positive answer. Korea has experienced rapid and unbalanced development, to a degree rarely seen in history. Korea has consistently developed over the past half-century. As a result, the dominant value in Korea has gradually become winning over others and achieving success through competition. Perhaps because Korea grew too quickly in just one or two generations, people have come to know how sweet material success can be. Ironically, despite its development, Koreans work longer hours than people in most other countries. I hope that we can reclaim the essential values of life, such as altruism and inner peace, and build a warmer culture.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Isaac!
There are some terms that you need to remember here.
Study them again and use them in sentences.
Keep practicing!^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
Although not everyone is the same in every culture, I would like to discuss a social problem that is particularly noticeable in Korea. 
>> Correct
Koreans today are living in a society obsessed with competition and sameness. 
>> Koreans today are living in a society obsessed with competition and conformity.
Korea may be a developed country, but when it comes to the question of whether it is a happy one, I don't think I can give a positive answer. 
>> Correct
Korea has experienced rapid and unbalanced development, to a degree rarely seen in history. 
>> Correct
Korea has consistently developed over the past half-century. 
>> Correct
As a result, the dominant value in Korea has gradually become winning over others and achieving success through competition. 
>> Correct
Perhaps because Korea grew too quickly in just one or two generations, people have come to know how sweet material success can be. 
>> Correct
Ironically, despite its development, Koreans work longer hours than people in most other countries. 
>> Ironically, despite its development, Koreans work longer hours than people in most countries. 
I hope that we can reclaim the essential values of life, such as altruism and inner peace, and build a warmer culture.
>> Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144131 for women, Why? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 677
144130 Homework. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 1
144129 What major changes did you have to make when moving from the... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 884
144128 soccer ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 0
144127 song ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 0
144126 how many days ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 0
144125 How do cultural differences affect closing deals in... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 0
144124 Our product follows global standards for connection and... ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 752
144123 what is something people often forget to be thankful for? ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-16 659
144122 Do you prefer shopping alone or with others? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 0
144121 How do you maintain your oral hygiene? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 902
144120 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 715
144119 Who in your life inspires you the most, and why? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 768
144118 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 2
144117 Should cyclists be reuired to take a safety course before riding... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 747
144116 Would you rather have a chill weekend or an active one? ÀÓ* ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 2
144115 Do you think society views aging positively or negatively? Why? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 922
144114 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 782
144113 0514 IELTS writing Task2 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 0
144112 The homework for 15th May. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-05-15 830

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04