¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In 3-5 sentences, talk about your most unforgettable summer experience.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2025-07-10 20

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Twenty years ago, I went to the beach with my sister and her family. On the way back home, a guy fell down in front of my brother-in-law's car, before he was hit by the car. The man was drunk, and he couldn't move. We called police officers, because he wanted. After the police officers arrived, women who were on a bus, shouted at them "The car didn't hit him, He fell down himself". We got back home without any problems.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Hwanny! ^^,)

Your story is indeed memorable because it was an unfortunate incident. Thankfully, it ended well for you and your sister's family.

Being ready and flexible is a good idea because unexpected things can happen at any time. Keeping an optimistic and adaptable attitude is essential while dealing with the unexpected. You can respond more skillfully to unforeseen circumstances if you are aware of your surroundings and potential hazards. 

Thank you so much for this composition.^^

__T. Mayleen :)


Twenty years ago, I went to the beach with my sister and her family.
>>> CORRECT
On the way back home, a guy fell down in front of my brother-in-law's car, before he was hit by the car.
>>> On our way back home, a guy fell down in front of my brother-in-law's car before he was hit by the car.
The man was drunk, and he couldn't move.
>>> CORRECT
We called police officers, because he wanted. After the police officers arrived, women who were on a bus, shouted at them "The car didn't hit him, He fell down himself".
>>> We called the police because he wanted to. After the police officers arrived, women who were on a bus shouted at them, "The car didn't hit him; he fell down himself."
We got back home without any problems.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144847 How is Apple\'s expansion to other countries going to be... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 0
144846 Do you think your workplace provides enough safety training? Why... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 500
144845 Homework ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 3
144844 Writing task 2 ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 54
144843 Tell me about a time you tried a new or foreign food. Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 43
144842 makeup ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 1
144841 flower ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 2
144840 jobs ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 60
144839 Have you ever seen a big change happen because of an annual... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 0
144838 In your opinion, what makes a good professional appointment? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 0
144837 Family name ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 71
144836 ¤Ó¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-30 56
144835 Homework ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 1
144834 ¼÷Á¦ ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 60
144833 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 71
144832 How could art be appreciated and enjoyed by more people? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 1
144831 What are three things you want to purchase for yourself? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 50
144830 How do reunions strengthen relationships among family and... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 0
144829 What do you think are the benefits of having regular health... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 0
144828 Can living with or near extended family create challenges? How? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-29 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04