¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it\'s important to take vacations regularly? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*¿µ
2025-07-15 35

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think recharging the energy to our mind and body is very important thing.
If we only have to spend out energy to do something, we should face on unfortunery in out life.
So I think we have to regularly take a rest after some works.
Therefore, I believe adults also need regular vocation the same as kids.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Stella,
As always, thank you for taking the time to answer this essay. :)
Absolutely! Rest is for everyone. I hope that when you go on vacation, you can completely disconnect from work and fully enjoy your time off. 
Rest isn¡¯t a luxury, it¡¯s a necessity. 
Thank you once again for your time tonight. See you again on Thursday! ^.^
- Teacher Elly~


I think recharging the energy to our mind and body is very important thing.
>> I think recharging our mind and body is very important.

If we only have to spend out energy to do something, we should face on unfortunery in out life.
>> If we only use our energy without resting, we may face misfortunes in life.

So I think we have to regularly take a rest after some works.
>> So I think we need to take regular breaks after doing some work.
OR >> So I think we need to get some rest after doing some work.

Therefore, I believe adults also need regular vocation the same as kids.
>> Therefore, I believe adults also need regular vacations, just like kids.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144925 Problem solving ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-07-04 120
144924 ¤Ó¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-04 120
144923 Homework ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-07-04 0
144922 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-07-04 101
144921 What are the possible causes for having a vice? ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 0
144920 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 1
144919 Writing homework ¹Ú*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 132
144918 No, not all parents who feed their children junk food are... ¼Õ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 104
144917 ¤Ó¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 102
144916 Who\'s the healthiest person you know? How do they maintain... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 111
144915 Have you ever felt that you knew some people the first time you... ÀÓ* ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 2
144914 Would winning the lottery change you? ÀÓ* ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 2
144913 If you could create your own new season, what would it be like? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 99
144912 How important are paid leave days to you when choosing a job? ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 96
144911 What do you think jobs will be like in the future? Explain. Á¶*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 108
144910 Homework ±Ç*°æ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 3
144909 AI ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 92
144908 expert ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 1
144907 Problem solving ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 99
144906 Do you enjoy hobbies that challenge you mentally, like puzzles... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-07-03 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04