¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think it\'s important to take vacations regularly? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*¿µ
2025-07-15 68

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think recharging the energy to our mind and body is very important thing.
If we only have to spend out energy to do something, we should face on unfortunery in out life.
So I think we have to regularly take a rest after some works.
Therefore, I believe adults also need regular vocation the same as kids.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Stella,
As always, thank you for taking the time to answer this essay. :)
Absolutely! Rest is for everyone. I hope that when you go on vacation, you can completely disconnect from work and fully enjoy your time off. 
Rest isn¡¯t a luxury, it¡¯s a necessity. 
Thank you once again for your time tonight. See you again on Thursday! ^.^
- Teacher Elly~


I think recharging the energy to our mind and body is very important thing.
>> I think recharging our mind and body is very important.

If we only have to spend out energy to do something, we should face on unfortunery in out life.
>> If we only use our energy without resting, we may face misfortunes in life.

So I think we have to regularly take a rest after some works.
>> So I think we need to take regular breaks after doing some work.
OR >> So I think we need to get some rest after doing some work.

Therefore, I believe adults also need regular vocation the same as kids.
>> Therefore, I believe adults also need regular vacations, just like kids.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
144709 What do you think is the best way to build a closer relationship... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 185
144708 What do you think makes a visitor feel welcome? Explain. ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 228
144707 test Te*002 ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 0
144706 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 205
144705 Who do you want to meet one day? why? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 184
144704 Do you think flexible work hours would benefit most people? Why... Á¶*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 190
144703 Homework. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 4
144702 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 310
144701 I smile a lot a day. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 176
144700 ¤Ó¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 167
144699 Homework ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 4
144698 burget ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 190
144697 Knowing the artist\'s background ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 152
144696 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 139
144695 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 218
144694 What was the best dining experience you had? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 3
144693 wish to be an actor ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-06-20 170
144692 0619 IELTS writing Task1 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-06-19 0
144691 Why is your arm in a cast? Write about it. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-19 187
144690 What do older kids enjoy playing with the most? Explain. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-06-19 238

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04