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Homework

작성자: 박*린
2025-07-28 167

회원님의 영작문

What's one good habit you always try to keep in your daily routine? Why is it important to you?

I write in my diary almost always. It's still pretty new, but I really enjoy writing diary.
Recently, I felt the importance of diary. When I write in diary, I can control my emotions better and understand myself more deeply.
Additionally I can memorize my young life and the emotions that day.
That's why keeping a diary is important to me.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Nieves,

Thank you for your thoughtful response. You did a great job expressing your ideas in a clear and sincere way. Your writing shows personal insight, and I can tell that keeping a diary is something truly meaningful to you. What I appreciate most is the emotional depth of your answer—you were able to connect the habit of journaling with self-understanding, emotional control, and memory keeping. These are not only valid reasons, but also powerful ones that reflect emotional maturity.

Your structure is also strong. You introduced your habit clearly, explained its value, and ended with a conclusion that brought your ideas together. This kind of structure makes your writing easy to follow and effective. To make your writing even stronger, I encourage you to include more specific details or examples. For instance, you could describe a day when writing helped you process something difficult or helped you remember something special. These personal touches allow your reader to connect more deeply with your story.

Another suggestion is to vary your language and expand your vocabulary. You’re already expressing yourself well, but using topic-specific vocabulary and natural expressions will help your writing sound even more fluent and expressive. Here are a few words and idiomatic phrases related to your topic that you might find useful:

 

Topic-Specific Vocabulary & Idiomatic Language

Jot down – to write something quickly or casually

Example: I always jot down my thoughts before going to bed.

 

Self-reflection – the process of thinking deeply about yourself

Example: Writing in my diary allows me time for self-reflection.

 

Keep a record of – to write something down so you can remember it later

Example: I keep a diary to keep a record of my daily emotions and experiences.

 

Unload your thoughts – to express and release what’s on your mind

Example: When I feel overwhelmed, writing helps me unload my thoughts.

 

Put my feelings into words – to express emotions clearly through writing

Example: My diary helps me put my feelings into words when I don’t know how to explain them out loud.

 

Your writing is calm, sincere, and meaningful. It’s easy to feel the care you put into your answer. Keep writing like this, Nieves—your voice is gentle but strong. Your ideas have value, and you’re already showing the ability to express them in a structured, thoughtful way. With continued practice and some vocabulary expansion, your writing will grow even more. I’m really proud of your effort today, and I hope you continue writing and sharing your thoughts. You're doing well—keep going.

~Teacher Cathy

 

I write in my diary almost always.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I write in my diary regularly.

It's still pretty new, but I really enjoy writing diary.

>>It's still pretty new to me, but I really enjoy writing in a diary.

Recently, I felt the importance of diary.

>>Recently, I’ve come to realize the importance of keeping a diary.

When I write in diary, I can control my emotions better and understand myself more deeply.

>>When I write in my diary, I can manage my emotions better and understand myself more deeply.

Additionally I can memorize my young life and the emotions that day.

>>Additionally, I can remember my youth and the emotions I felt on that day.

That's why keeping a diary is important to me.

>>CORRECT

OR>>For this reason, keeping a diary holds special value for me.

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