¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

When do children leave their parents\' home in your country?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÁØ
2021-01-26 358

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my country, usally 25 years old leave from their parents.
They starts to the work. and alone live in rental house.
They starts to the work. and then they will alone live in rental house.
In my case, actually, I Independent 20years old.
since then, I am not receive petty cash from my parents.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Chris!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


In my country, usally 25 years old leave from their parents.

>> In my country, they usually leave their parent's house at the age of 25.

They starts to the work. and then they will alone live in rental house.

>> They start to work. and live alone in a rental house.
In my case, actually, I Independent 20years old.

>> In my case, actually, I started to be independent when I was 20 years old.
since then, I am not receive petty cash from my parents.

>> Since then, I haven't received any cash from my parents.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
104800 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 299
104799 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 304
104798 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 2
104797 What qualities do you look for in a friend? À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 1
104796 What do you like doing when it is raining? Explain why ¾ö*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 350
104795 Can you tell me about the most important lesson you\\\'ve... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 275
104794 Korean sweet foods ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 309
104793 Can you tell me about the most important lesson you\'ve learned... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 0
104792 Made-in-Korea COVID-19 treatments ready to hit market À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 1
104791 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 394
104790 Can you tell me about the most important lesson you\'ve learned... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 1
104789 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 2
104788 Why do you think it\'s hard for us to ask for an apology? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 2
104787 Some people believe that the experiences children have before... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 817
104786 In order to hone your craft, have you ever taken any courses... Ȳ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 1070
104785 ielts taks 1 ÀÌ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 358
104784 I\'m sorry about I did homework late. Á¶*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 2
104783 What do you want to achieve for your health in the next 5years? Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 354
104782 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-19 349
104781 At the others country hotel Çã*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-18 557

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04