¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

People today increasingly use credit cards to make monthly purchases. Do the advantages of this outw

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-01-27 350

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The use of credit card enable people to purchase goods and service easy. People don't need to bring cash if we get a credit card. Since the smartphone introduced, we don't even need to bring a credit card because a smartphone has the function of payment. I have lost my purse several times so I have been issued my credit card and ID card again. The smartphone makes people convenient in various field. It reduce the risk of lost and we don't have to worry about robbery too. However, there are serious disadvantages when we use a credit card. First of all, we tend to spend more money because we don't usually check how much we use the credit card. Secondly, people think that they don't spend much money if they use installment plan with their credit card. Lastly, customers can get membership points according to their spending or get discount if they use a specific card, so it makes people to spend over their monthly budget. In conclusion, if we use it right way, it will help our lives.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great day MR. HWANG! Thank you for always trying to converse with me effectively. And your essays, they are commendable! Keep it up! Have a good day!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The use of credit card enable people to purchase goods and service easy.
>>> The use of credit cards enable the people to purchase goods and service easily.
 People don't need to bring cash if we get a credit card. 
>>> CORRECT
OR >>> People don't need to bring cash if we carry a credit card.
Since the smartphone introduced, we don't even need to bring a credit card because a smartphone has the function of payment.
>>> From the moment the smartphone was introduced, we don't even need to bring a credit card because a smartphone has mobile payment.
 I have lost my purse several times so I have been issued my credit card and ID card again. 
>>>  I have lost my purse several times so I have been issued a credit card and an ID card again. 
The smartphone makes people convenient in various field. 
>>> The smartphone gives people convenience in various ways. 
It reduce the risk of lost and we don't have to worry about robbery too. 
>>> CORRECT
However, there are serious disadvantages when we use a credit card. 
>>> CORRECT
First of all, we tend to spend more money because we don't usually check how much we use the credit card.
>>> CORRECT
 Secondly, people think that they don't spend much money if they use installment plan with their credit card.
>>> CORRECT
 Lastly, customers can get membership points according to their spending or get discount if they use a specific card, so it makes people to spend over their monthly budget.
>>> CORRECT
 In conclusion, if we use it right way, it will help our lives.
>>>  In conclusion, if we use it in a right way, it will help our lives.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
105046 Do you enjoy the food on the airplane? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 4
105045 I like working out alone. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 2
105044 I want to change my habit when I\'m angry. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 2
105043 When do children leave their parents\' home in your country? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 340
105042 ENGLISH HOMEWORK 19 ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 231
105041 Do you enjoy the food on the airplane? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 1
105040 What do you really hate having to do in your free time? And why... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 1
105039 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 3
105038 What success have you had in this English class? What can you do... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 2
105037 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 4
105036 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 293
105035 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 341
105034 When do children leave their parents\' home in your country? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 1
105033 1st homework ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 305
105032 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 324
105031 Parents should spend a lot of time playing games or sports with... Á¤*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 0
105030 We all will become old. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 305
105029 homework ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 0
105028 homework ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 0
105027 Why do people say laughter is the best medicine? Do you think so... ä*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-26 294

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04