¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Winter season

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Î*Á¤
2021-01-28 370

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi, Lucy.
It was snowy here fron 10 to 11 this mornng.
Than time, my son and I went a bakery walking.
It's an hour's walk from there.
The bakery is our favorite store because there makes bread by rice.
It seemed peaceful that snow piled up is at the vast land when I watched from movie or America drama.
Although small area, I wanted to walk on the snow.
Whe we left from bakery, the snow has stopped but it started strong wind.
It was really cold.
In the cold winter season, I do to wear thick clothe, turn on the boiler, and drink warm water a lot.
It's tolerable to get used to the cold because it's cold for days and warm for days.
Good night.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you Ms. Suzan!
Oh, how I wish I could experience those stuff. :)
~Lucy

It was snowy here fron 10 to 11 this mornng.
>>It was snowy here from 10 to 11 this morning.
Than time, my son and I went a bakery walking.
>>That time, my son and I went to a bakery by walking.
It's an hour's walk from there.
>>CORRECT!
The bakery is our favorite store because there makes bread by rice.
>>The bakery is our favorite store because they make bread by rice.
It seemed peaceful that snow piled up is at the vast land when I watched from movie or America drama.
>>It seemed peaceful that snow piled up at the vast land when I watched from movie or America drama.
Although small area, I wanted to walk on the snow.
>>Although, it's a small area, I wanted to walk on the snow.
Whe we left from bakery, the snow has stopped but it started strong wind.
>>When we left the bakery, the snow has stopped but it strong wind has started.
It was really cold.
>>CORRECT!
In the cold winter season, I do to wear thick clothe, turn on the boiler, and drink warm water a lot.
>>CORRECT!
It's tolerable to get used to the cold because it's cold for days and warm for days.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
104875 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-21 229
104874 How do I take care of my hair Àü*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-01-21 1
104873 Even though doctors advise old people to get more exercise, many... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-21 290
104872 homework_21.01.19 ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-21 3
104871 It\'s my homework Á¶*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-21 236
104870 Composition º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-21 2
104869 The most difficult change I have ever had to make ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 288
104868 What was your favorite trip? Why? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 1
104867 What was the worst thing a \"sasaeng\" did? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 0
104866 What is something that you need to focus on improving this 2021? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 6
104865 Do you think people rely too much on computers? Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 294
104864 Do you like spending time at home? Why or why not? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 342
104863 (HW) Are there any foods that bring back special memories for... Á¤*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 377
104862 Jean teacher! My first homework. ¹®*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 2
104861 I can live for one day without my mobile phone. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 266
104860 Homework (207) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 305
104859 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 318
104858 Traditional Korean Food ±è*Âù ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 312
104857 [1/19]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 1
104856 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-01-20 280

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04