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Travel

작성자: 김*환
2021-01-31 912

회원님의 영작문

In 2019, My family went on a vacation to Jeju island.
The day, we were leaving, I woke up early to pack my stuff for vacation. The previous day I had a dinner with my friends, so I came back home lately. My wife packed our children's luggage. I needed to pack my luggage.
After preparing, we went to airport on time. After 1 hour, we arrived in Jeju island. The lunch was nice. My boss allowed me to pay for lunch with company's card. After lunch we moved to brewery to buy beer. Until that time, the vacation was perfect.
After buying beer, my wife started nagging me. She blamed me about coming back lately last night. We fought, and we hadn't talked anymore until coming back home. I was really angry. Even if we spent lots of money, We had terrible vacation. Finally, I got stomachache because of stress. The last day of vacation, water only was allowed me.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Kim Il Hwan,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)


Travel

In 2019, My family went on a vacation to Jeju island.
>>> CORRECT

The day, we were leaving, I woke up early to pack my stuff for vacation.
>>> On the day we were leaving, I woke up early to pack my stuff for the vacation. 

The previous day I had a dinner with my friends, so I came back home lately. 
>>> The previous day I had dinner with my friends, so I came back home late. 

My wife packed our children's luggage. I needed to pack my luggage.
>>> CORRECT

After preparing, we went to airport on time. After 1 hour, we arrived in Jeju island. 
>>> After preparing, we went to the airport on time. After 1 hour, we arrived on Jeju island. 

The lunch was nice. My boss allowed me to pay for lunch with company's card. 
>>> The lunch was nice. My boss allowed me to pay for lunch with the company's card. 

After lunch we moved to brewery to buy beer. Until that time, the vacation was perfect.
>>> Then we moved to the brewery to buy beer. Until that time, the vacation was perfect.

After buying beer, my wife started nagging me. She blamed me about coming back lately last night. 
>>> After buying beer, my wife started nagging me. She blamed me for coming back late last night.

We fought, and we hadn't talked anymore until coming back home.
>>> We fought, and we hadn't talked anymore until we came back home.

I was really angry. Even if we spent lots of money, We had terrible vacation. 
>>> I was really angry. Even if we spent lots of money, we still had a good vacation. 

Finally, I got stomachache because of stress. 
>>> CORRECT

The last day of vacation, water only was allowed me.
>>> On the last day of vacation, playing on the water was the only thing that made me happy.

*Note: I don't really get what you mean on the last sentence. 
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