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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

The first man to walk on the moon claimed it was a step forward for mankind. However, it has made li

작성자: 황*하
2021-02-04 517

회원님의 영작문

I was dreaming of being an astronaut when I was young. Every person have thought about it at least once during their life time. I didn't understand why human tried to explorer space. I thought it was just human's desire to find something new. but I knew that we can get a lot of benefits from the experiments in the space. Common uses of space research are smoke detector, computer bar codes, absorbing shoes and lightweight materials. We can find other technology in medical field. The face maker is the representative finding from the space. We got a lot of benefits from the space technology which we don't know how and who find the skills and technology. Some people claim that it is waste of money so they insist that money should be used for poor people or when we have had problem such as national disaster. We have seen a lot of problem caused from human's desire such as global warming. We might need to find alternative places to live in the future. So space exploration should be perform

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Mr. Hwang~! ^^ Take up one idea, make that one idea your life. Think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success. 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I was dreaming of being an astronaut when I was young. 
>>> CORRECT
Every person have thought about it at least once during their life time. 
>>> Every person has thought about it at least once in their life time. 
I didn't understand why human tried to explorer space.
>>> I couldn't understand why humans are trying to explore the space.
 I thought it was just human's desire to find something new.
>>> CORRECT
 but I knew that we can get a lot of benefits from the experiments in the space.
>>> CORRECT
 Common uses of space research are smoke detector, computer bar codes, absorbing shoes and lightweight materials.
>>> CORRECT
We can find another technology in medical field. 
>>> CORRECT
The face maker is the representative finding from the space.
>>> The face maker is the representative found from the space.
 We got a lot of benefits from the space technology which we don't know how and who find the skills and technology. 
>>> CORRECT
Some people claim that it is waste of money so they insist that money should be used for poor people or when we have had problem such as national disaster. 
>>> Some people claim that it is a waste of money so they insist that money should be used for poor people or when we have have problems such as national disasters. 
We have seen a lot of problem caused from human's desire such as global warming.
>>> We have seen a lot of problems caused by human's desire such as global warming.
 We might need to find alternative places to live in the future. 
>>> CORRECT
So space exploration should be performed.
>>> CORRECT
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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03
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